Adam, he didn’t say all pastors should be married. He said the stats show that most churches hire married/fathered pastors and he strongly implied if he had a vote at a church for picking their next pastor that his first choices would be married/fathered. But he also said “I do not have the right nor textual authority to state without equivocation that a pastor cannot be unmarried (as in never married).”

I think what he meant was that a family is the pastor’s greatest professional reference - even in a time when many churches would rather look to corporations for advice on how to structure itself, the Bible still stands that the church is more like a big family. The absence of leading a family in a pastor’s life is not a dead end, but still leaves a large whole in his ‘resume’ that the church should look for greater strengths elsewhere (e.g., that he doesn’t supplant the time a father would spend training his kids with idle or immature tasks but is using singleness to greater ministry). It seems a single man may have more time for ministry, but a father and husband is more likely to be greater equipped for ministry, simply based on his ever growing personal experience in home.

My issue is that he seems to be saying that marriage should be default because of culture. And if that is the case, then why not include children?

Or why should we speak against culture of a church in other areas? I know he does not oppose speaking against sin in a church.

But he did not really address the issues of sin that prevent churches from calling single pastors. And I think that was the point on the NYT article, even if it did not use that language.

When I have heard people talk (Christianity Today has had some articles on this) it is almost always about the problems of singleness of the pastor, not their qualification for ministry. That is about judging the person on external issues not their readiness for that particular church.

When I hear from people, it is about concerns of homosexuality or potential child abuse. That is about cultural fear not about the actual person and role. All Molher did was feed into this, not speak against it.

Being single is TRICKY.

Being married and having children is so highly regarded to the point that it’s really easy to feel inferior about being single.

Hardly no one is content with a single’s singleness, so that makes it difficult for a single to be content with his or her own situation. Try being single in your late 20s and early 30s at church. You’ll endure being set-up, consoled, and prayed over like you need to be cured of leprosy. If my church family keeps bringing up my singleness in a negative manner, how am I supposed to be satisfied and content with what God wants for me?