For some time now I have been pondering the value of writing about the reasons that wife and I have chosen to have our children educated through the public school system. Public schools are not the only option available to us. We are capable of homeschooling our children—we are both well-educated and each have a university degree. There are homeschooling groups in our town that we could tap into and endless numbers of homeschooling resources available to us. While it would definitely be a huge strain on our finances, (to the point that either my wife or I might have to be willing to take on a part-time job), we could possibly even come up with $10,000 a year to enroll our children in a local Christian school. Practically, though, the options for my family come down to public schools or homeschool. We have chosen to place our children in public schools. And now I am going to tell you why.
Before I continue, I would like to affirm that I believe this is an area in which Christians have freedom from God to do what we feel is appropriate for our individual families. This is an area of weaker and stronger Christians. I do not believe that any of the options—homeschooling, Christian schooling or public schooling—is inherently wrong, but feel that each family must follow their convictions on this matter. I do not judge or condemn those who choose other options. The real sin would be to violate one’s conscience or to look negatively upon those who choose other options. As my pastor says in this article, depending on your view on this subject you may fall into the weak category or the strong category. In either case, you will be “tempted by the devil, the world and your flesh to either despise or condemn those who hold a different view from yours…Depending on whether you are weak or strong, you are being tempted to despise other members of this church or condemn other members of this church. If you deny that, you deny God’s Word. Paul does not say, some of you are in this weak/strong struggle. No, he says all of us fall into one or the other classification.” The strong are tempted to despise and the weak are tempted to condemn. Let’s be sure that we do not fall into either sin.
Of course not everyone believes, as I do, that we have freedom in this area. To these people I urge charity. I grew up in a church where Christian schooling was expected and demanded. I have read any number of articles by those who choose to homeschool who believe that homeschooling is the only biblical option for educating children. While these people may make some valid arguments, I am not convicted by Scripture or by plain reason that we must avoid public schools.
There is one more thing I would like to say before I get too much further into this article. Homeschooling parents are easily offended (See? I offended you just by saying that!). Some may consider this a rash generalization, but in my experience it is true. Homeschoolers are often on the defensive, though certainly this is changing as homeschooling becomes a more widely accepted option in the church and in the wider culture. For many years homeschoolers have had to defend their choice in education and they have grown weary of defending against misunderstandings and strawman arguments. I am not going to argue that, if we homeschool, our children will end up having no social skills, we will have to move to the country to raise our own beef, I’ll have to throw away my deodorant and my wife will have to grow her hair past her waist and begin making all of our clothes. I hope not to fall into caricatures of homeschooling. Feel free to correct me if I do. There is much I admire about those who choose to homeschool. Honest. At the same time, please do not use caricatures to describe public schools as being always boring, filled with disinterested Wiccan teachers or serving as training grounds for automatons who are being trained only to work in factories.
And with this in mind I would like to explain why my wife and I have chosen to have our children attend public schools. Please note the word “chosen.” Some people seem to feel that only in the absence of conviction do parents send their children to public schools. This is not the case with my wife. Aileen and I, having spent a great deal of time thinking and praying over the options available to us, send our children to public schools on the basis of conviction.
I think it bears mention here that homeschooling is not typically an isolated choice. In my experience (and I have quite extensive experience with families that homeschool) the decision to homeschool is an aspect of a larger ideology. There is a set of underlying beliefs that prompt a family to homeschool their children. In my experience an aspect of these beliefs deal with how Christians are to interact with the world. For example, I am sure you would find it true that families that place their children in Christian schools are somewhat less likely to allow their children to participate in Halloween than families that place their children in public schools. It is easy to say that these families only participate in Halloween because they do not feel they can deny their children a privilege every other child in the class will enjoy, but I think this is too simplistic a view. Some people’s understanding of how Christians are to interact with the culture lead them to participate in events such as Halloween. There would be a further degree of separation between families that homeschool versus families that accept public schools so that children of homeschooling families are far less likely to participate in Halloween than children who attend public schools. You and I both know this is true.
I would suggest that there may be other differences relating to children participating in sports leagues (children in public schools will, in my experience, be more likely to participate in leagues than children who are educated in other ways) and even in the way a family relates to other families in the neighborhood. Homeschooling can rarely be separated from other aspects of a family’s beliefs and the outworking of those beliefs. Parenthetically, I will affirm that this is not always the case. There are some families who may break the mold, but I think the point is valid and clear and applies to the majority of families who homeschool.
Douglas Wilson differentiates between homeschoolers and what he called “Homers” in an article he wrote for Credenda Agenda. Homeschoolers, he says, are “people who have carefully considered all the options available to them in the education of their children, have prayerfully weighed them, and have decided to provide their children with an education at home.” Homers are extremists who “have a completely different attitude toward the process of homeschooling. No longer an instrument or means of educating their children, homeschooling has become, in their hands, a very modern manifestation of home as ideology. In this thinking, home is a defining principle to which everything else must conform. Even the church is brought into the service of the home. Father is no longer a father; he is a prophet, priest and king. Any home is capable of doing anything that is worth doing. A radical home-centeredness takes over, insisting that the home can not only replace the school, but also the church and the civil magistrate, not to mention Safeway and General Motors.”
I am not sure the distinction between these two groups is always perfectly clear, but do think Wilson makes a distinction worth noting. What makes both groups similar, though, is that the decision to homeschool cannot be removed from other beliefs and ideologies. At the risk of belaboring the point, let me state this once more: homeschooling is rarely a decision that is completely independent of other beliefs. The beliefs that impact educational choice are, in my experience, related to the understanding of how we, as Christians, are to relate to the people and to the culture around us. It is related to how we are to be in the world but not of the world.
And all this is to say that my beliefs about the world and the culture and the relationship of Christians to them is a large part of what motivates me to send my children to public schools. Just as ideology is what motivates some Christians to homeschool, ideology motivates me to have my children in the public school system. I am convicted that my children ought to be in public schools.
And, lest this article grow to a ridiculous length, I will break here and return tomorrow (Lord willing) with more on this topic.

Comments (119) »
1. Ron Harvey
December 12, 2006
11:03 AM
Tim,
As a pastor, and while two kids were growing up, I was asked over and over again why I didn’t “home-school, or send them to a Christian School.” To which I answered, “They are home-schooled and they do get a Christian education.” We were every bit involved with our kids education from one inch within the frame of the door at home and to one inch of the frame of the school house door. When there were board meetings that I felt I should attend (they are ALWAYS on a Wednesday night) I would get someone to cover for me at mid-week Bible study (wow, I am dating myself). That’s how we got involved, stay involved … that is the key.
2. s. zeilenga
December 12, 2006
11:05 AM
I was raised in a Christian family and my parents sent me to public school. I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything. I loved my time there. And I managed remain pure (sexually, drug use etc) through graduation. I was able to connect with the few Christians who went to that school with me and witness effectively to the others. I would even venture to say that my faith is stronger because of the 6 years of public school testing and molding. God really used it to mature my faith.
But, having said that, I am not sure if I will send my kids to public school. I am only dating my future wife now, so we haven’t talked much on this subject, but I would definately have to hear from God on what to do. I don’t trust the public school system in what they teach, or in how they supervise my child in the midst of the current system.
I think what it comes down to for many (at least it did for me) is the strength and character that the child learns from the parents. Christian education starts at home.
z.
3. Bibliomaniac
December 12, 2006
11:09 AM
Tim said: “Before I continue, I would like to affirm that I believe this is an area in which Christians have freedom from God to do what we feel is appropriate for our individual families.”
Thank you for saying that up front, Tim.
My wife and I are not homeschoolers, but we have friends who homeschool, and we fully support those parents who choose this path. However, I’ve lost count of the number of times that homeschool parents have looked at us glaringly and condescendingly when they find out we don’t homeschool our kids. We used to sell children’s books at large homeschool conventions, and whenever we struck up conversations with parents and the details came out that we didn’t homeschool, many parents would suddenly abort the conversation and acted as if they’d found out we had leprosy. The self-righteousness was so sickening we finally stopped doing homeschool shows altogether.
Fortunately, we know several homeschool couples who haven’t been so judgmental…and we value and appreciate their friendship.
4. John Hollandsworth
December 12, 2006
11:17 AM
Well, since this is one of those non-controversial posts that won’t generate much comment, I’ll put in mine to keep it from being too lonely.
We have both homeschooled and Christian schooled and have thought about public schooling. My major concern with public schooling, at least in my area, is my young children being exposed to things, like profanity and sexual crudity, that they are not yet spiritually equipped to handle. Teachers in typical school settings simply can’t control what goes on in the hall, in the bathrooms, on the playground. We have had to deal with these issues in our private Christian school, and I could cite multiple conversations with parents saying the situation is much worse in the public arena. I don’t have a problem with a 16 year old walking where they may be rattlesnakes by himself, I do have a problem with a 4 year old being alone around them. That said, there are difficulties with raising kids no matter how you do it in a fallen world, and I agree with Tim that this is an area that Scripture gives us principles, not pronouncements.
5. Todd H. from Zeeland
December 12, 2006
11:40 AM
I’m curious, would you choose Christian schooling if it were free?
For me it is worth the financial sacrafice (and I know its a big one) to have my children in a school where God is tought in the classroom versus a school where God is not even mentioned.
TH
6. Steve Sensenig
December 12, 2006
11:45 AM
I’ll refrain from commenting until you’ve had your say completely, Tim, but did want to at least poke my head in here to say that I’m really looking forward to reading the rest of this. I’m sure it will spark some interesting discussion, to say the least ;)
steve :)
7. Albert
December 12, 2006
11:48 AM
Tim,
My wife and I are a young couple currently without any children. We also know many good Christian families who have adopted a wide range of convictions regarding child schooling. It is probably the biggest decision Christian and non-Christian parents make next to having children in the first place. I agree, wholeheartedly, with you regarding the fact that there is a lot of freedom in this area. I also agree with you about the fact that homeschoolers are typically more militant in their ideological convictions and it clearly translates to other areas in their interactions with the world at large.
While we don’t have children yet, my chief concerns regarding public school is not necessarily the “moral” issues that our children may face at school, e.g., profanity, sex, drug use. I hope that if we raise them right and Lord-willing they become Christians, they will make proper choices accordingly. If they don’t, they certainly will face the consequences of their actions, one way or the other.
However, I am most concerned with the ideologies and philosophies being promoted at public schools. I feel that younger children, especially, would have a very hard time with such a dichotomy between what their parents are telling them is “truth” and what their teachers are telling them what is “truth.” Why send my children to school everyday and tell them when they come home that much of what they learned is wrong. The worldview differences between what is promulgated through contemporary secular schools is so distinct and contrary to what the Bible promotes. I feel in time, probably during adolescence, children can figure out the differences, but during primary school ages, they are being bombarded with ideologies from all over.
I believe in interacting with the world and culture at large. I just don’t know if I want to use my little children as part of that interaction.
Cheers,
Albert
8. Peter
December 12, 2006
11:51 AM
Thanks for sharing your thoughts with humility and respect Tim. As a former homeschooler, it is my fervent hope that people who share my convictions on homeschooling approach this comment section with the same level of humility. The seemingly endless critique we receive for our educational choices should motivate us to respond with the grace we wished we received more often.
I am eager to hear more of your thoughts, as well as those of your readers.
9. John Hollandsworth
December 12, 2006
11:55 AM
Tim,
I agree that Christian schools are populated by children with sin natures, just like public schools, but I think the expression, in both severity and quantity, is less, although that is very dependent on the individual school, whether Christian or public. I’ve talked to local parents who had to explain the F word scrawled on a 4th grade classroom wall and talk about their 7th grader being solicited to buy drugs on school property and teenagers being afraid even to enter a school restroom alone—- these are conditions that exist in my local public schools that don’t in a private school environment. But, you also have to equip your kids to recognize evil and either flee or fight, as the occasion demands. I think it depends on the individual child, the individual situation, as to where God’s will lies.
10. Flawedcricket
December 12, 2006
11:58 AM
I was looking foward to your post due to the fact that my wife and I are thinking/praying through this exact issue. Our three children currently attend a Christian school where my wife is also a teacher. We pray every year about home/Christian/home school, this year moreso than ever due to their increasing ages which we’ve found affects each option. Not to mention the fact that I pastor a church in which most families home-school (the families who are involved in Christian and public schools are in the minority).
All that said, I am disappointed because I now have to wait until tomorrow to actually read your reasons for sending your kids to public school. You had to spend 1478 words and 3 pages (yes, I counted) qualifying your decision and making sure no one was offended because Christians, for the most part, have never read or studied Romans 14.
Maybe this article should have been titled, “Education: A Matter of Liberty/Conscience”. Then, once that was settled, you could follow-up with, “Why I Do Not Homeschool”. Of course, the title, “Why I Do Not Homeschool” is going to offend many simply because the wording will lead them to believe you don’t homeschool your kids due to the disadvantages of homeschooling rather than the advantages of public schooling. Maybe, “Why I Send My Kids to Public School” would be better.
Really, you’re in trouble at this point no matter what title you use or what arguments you present and I still have to wait until tomorrow.
11. Steve Camp
December 12, 2006
12:03 PM
Tim:
Very good article… couldn’t agree more.
Being a father of five (four of which are teenagers now), they currently attend public school (which in this area of the country are excellent with many of the teachers and principals are Christian).
I was raised in Wheaton, IL and attended public schools all of my life and also value those experiences.
For the first few years my older children attended the finest private school in the Nashville area. It was money wasted.
Parents who home-school I do respect and understand the myriad of reasoning behind it. But I do not see the public school system (at least in our area) as the nexus of evil intent that most evangelicals claim it is.
It is clearly a conscience issue. FYI, - the life and example of Daniel proves helpful on this as well (Daniel 1-2).
Thank you again brother for your thoughts…
Campi
12. Lisa C.
December 12, 2006
12:06 PM
Hi Tim,
As a homeschooling mom of 5 kids, (ranging in age from 7 to 16) who wears makeup, who buys white bread from the store, who doesn’t own a denim jumper, who lives in a subdivision and who drives a regular mini van rather than a 14-passenger bus, I appreciate your attempt at not boiling down all homeschoolers into their typical charicatures.
I never EVER planned on being a homeschooling mom. I don’t fit the mold. But our decision wasn’t about me.
People homeschool for many reasons. In my case, my husband and I sought the Lord, and we know that for our family this is what He would have us do. My assumption is that you and your wife sought His will, too, although I didn’t see that mentioned in your article. I did see you mention conviction, but this can be based on ideology alone, with or without the Holy Spirit’s prompting in such areas. I can argue a lot of things, but when a brother or sister in the Lord tells me they sense a leading from the Holy Spirit to decide on something in the “freedom in the Lord” category, who am I to argue with that?
Respect is a rare commodity in the church as a whole, sadly. Homeschoolers feel they must defend their choice, as do public schoolers and Christian schoolers. We all must make decisions for our families (hey, it even starts in the infant years… have you experienced the breastfeeding vs. bottle feeding wars, or the attachment parenting vs. Ezzo wars? Yikes) I’ll be honest, it bothers me that you felt you even needed to defend your choice. Perhaps we’re all too much into each others’ business, as my mom would say ;-)
FWIW, I do not have a degree. Various studies have indicated that the lack of post high school education has no effect on homeschoolers’ standardized testing scores. This has been our experience, too. Several of my kids test years ahead of their actual grades, and are actively involved in sports events alongside and on the same teams as public/private schoolers. They are active in the community, neighborhood and church. Many people are surprised to find out that my kids are homeschoolers… not sure if that’s good or bad *wink*, but they do engage in the culture in doses that my husband and I feel are appropriate for their individual ages, personality types, strengths and weaknesses.
I will say that my husband’s extensive experience as a youth pastor (over 20yrs.) did play a role in our decision to teach our kids at home. Yet that same experience also caused us to choose to not cloister our kids from the world in which they live. We really feel they’re getting the best of both worlds, yet we know not everyone will make that same decision in their families, and we’re OK with that.
Looking forward to seeing the rest of your article.
13. jason allen
December 12, 2006
12:08 PM
Thanks for your thoughts, I appreciate what you have said and how you have said it.
14. blest
December 12, 2006
12:16 PM
“Homeschoolers are easily offended” …
Actually, I think parents in general are easily offended at anything that implies judgment on their decisions regarding their children. Public school parents are just as sensitive in their interactions with homeschoolers. I’m a pretty mellow homeschooler - I really don’t consider others’ choices about education to be my business. But more often than not, as soon as I say I homeschool (usually in response to a question like “Where does Daniel go to school?), the non-homeschooling parent goes on the defensive. There have also been a lot of accusations of homeschool snobbery (not here - I mean in general) when the real issue was scheduling. I hang out with homeschoolers more because of logistical considerations. Parents whose kids are in school are much more limited in when they can get together because of the school’s timetable.
We’re all touchy. And it’s next to impossible to discuss your reasons for doing what your doing without giving the impression that you are disdaining those who think differently.
But of course Tim, you are doing a great job of writing graciously - as usual. :-)
15. Jim Vellenga
December 12, 2006
12:30 PM
Nice introduction, all be it, a little long. What impresses me is how hard you try not to offend anyone through their misunderstanding what you are are actually saying. Bravo!
I have been in both public schools (elementary levels) and Christian school (highschool levels). My experiences in both were good, but in my public school times, there were others who agreed with me on certain worldview issues. (Not that I would have called them that back then) Today, talking to the teens I teach in my catechism class, the picture is quite different. The Post-modern secular mindset has filled the schools around here to the point most of them found school a constant battle, which even they as highschool students were not really ready for.
Having said that, some school districts are very different than that, so that would be a factor for me as well.
As for the choice, and yes I agree there is a choice in this, of schooling methods, my wife and I have decided to home school. I am looking forward to your presentation on the reason for the public school choice
16. drliz
December 12, 2006
12:32 PM
I love the masterful use of qualifing and parenthetical statements and clauses in this entry! I’m not a blogger (yet), but my friends get a kick out of my email because I try to anticipate every possible question or reaction and respond up front. So a brief story becomes terribly long, with opinions and research given and qualified again and again. Anyway, that’s what I thought of when I read your entry.
I’m a strong supporter of homeschooling, although I have great friends that I respect who work in public education. Of course, I don’t have any kids, so I can straddle the fence easily on this one. But my sister, who has five kids, homeschools. It took me a while to come around to her point of view. Probably what really clinched my support is the fact that it drives my very “mainstream” brother (with one kid who isn’t even in school yet) just a little nuts. Unlike you, he’s got the uniformed “but that what’s you have to do or your kids will end up weird…” line, so it’s just too tempting to drive him crazy by not agreeing with him that my sister is nuts!
17. SolShine7
December 12, 2006
12:40 PM
Challies,
Good topic. What I find interesting is how very American this topic is. I wonder how many other non-American families have the privilege to debate over this issue. Not everyone has the resources to homeschool or send their children to Christian schooling.
I wonder what the world would think if we as Christians decided to forfeit the money we send our children to private school and send it to children in foreign countries who may not be able to go to school at all because of finacial difficulties. At least we have the option of public schooling.
18. Jim Crigler
December 12, 2006
12:41 PM
1. Could you post a reference to Doug Wilson’s quote.
2. Thanks (from a home schooler)
19. Lisa C.
December 12, 2006
12:46 PM
SolShine7, interesting comment. I like it! However, I am not sure you’re aware of this, but I can homeschool all 5 of my kids, ranging in age from 1st to 11th grade, for less than $400 for the year. Amazing, isn’t it? Yet where I live, the school district on average receives about $5000 per enrolled pupil in the form of property tax revenues, along with state funding.
20. Paul
December 12, 2006
12:55 PM
I went to public schools in a small town in rural Iowa and had a great experience. There were really no extraordinary issues with bad behavior or secular humanist indoctrination. However, since moving to the Denver area, most of my peers tell stories of high school that are vastly different. I would not want to go through their experiences or put my children through that either.
I look forward to Part 2 tomorrow! I’m not (yet) married, but I tuck these things away in order to be better informed when the time comes.
21. christopher
December 12, 2006
1:01 PM
Here are a couple of questions for consideration:
(1) might it be the case that some parents who homeschool (or send their children to Christian schools) prefer to have their children associate with sinners of the pharisaical variety, rather than the tax collectors and prostitutes?
(2) might it be that some homeschool parents are unaware that the sins of the pharisees are just as (if not more) dangerous to their children than the sins of the tax collectors and prostitutes?
22. jenn r
December 12, 2006
1:07 PM
One of the comments before mine said that it is worth the sacrifice to put his kids in a school where God is taught as opposed to a school where God is not even mentioned.
I went to public school for 13 years and am now a student at the University of Florida. That being said, I was a strong believer all throughout middle school, high school, and now, in college, am an active member of a Sovereign Grace church here in Gainesville. On the other hand, there are over 10 students they went to my church’s private christian school through 8th grade, then went to the same high school as me, and are now students at UF as well. Not one of them is involved in either a campus ministry or a church up here. They would be Christmas/Easter Christians at best, despite the fact that they grew up in private christian schooling.
They may have had a more conservative schooling experience than I. But somehow, in the grace of God, I am the one who is following him daily, not them. Can either of these two situations be attributed to our differing schooling experiences?
Public school made me strong and taught me an INSANE amount of how to be in the world, but not of it. I learned how to share the gospel in my every breath, not just in some outline form in Bible class. God’s mercy kept me pure in every way-sex, drugs, alcohol…I never once went to a party in high school, but I wasn’t a nerd. I was even class President.
(This is not to knock home and private schooling. I honestly don’t know how the Lord will lead me to raise my kids. I just know that for me, public schooling was the Lord’s will and instrument for shaping my life.)
My soul’s desire to bring glory to the Lord has nothing to do with the education background I had, but instead, everything to do with a gracious God who has seen fit to keep me stong in His grace. Public, home, private, or “homer”…whichever way you choose to raise your children, it is the authentic relationship with the Lord that matters most in their lives, not the category of diploma they recieve.
23. SDGtheologica
December 12, 2006
1:13 PM
Thank you for challenging my views. I hope in the future to homeschool, if God wills. However, iron sharpening iron is always a good thing! It will be interesting to read the remainder of your post and have my ideas and hopes challenged.
Thanks Tim!
“Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future.” Proverbs 19:20
24. Jake Aharonian
December 12, 2006
1:19 PM
Tim,
I applaud your courage in tackling this subject publicly. I agree with your sentiments regarding the status of public education; I also appreciate what Steve Camp had to say regarding the matter.
Perhaps this might add another log to the fire of discussion. While I don’t know the state of education in Canada (I’m from Northern California), I can speak to my reasons for desiring a non-public school education for my son: the schools simply aren’t good enough here. I have many friends who labour diligently within the public school system here in CA; while they do so with a heart of service and love for the children whom the Lord has given them, they all acknowledge that with budget cuts, overcrowding, the No Child Left Behind Act, et al., their ability to actually educate children is greatly hindered. There are simply too many children, and too few teachers.
Now, I know this isn’t the situation in all the 50 states (and perhaps Canada too); I know that if my wife and I lived in another state (Kansas and Texas come to mind), we would be far less reticent to send our children to public school.
With this being the case, we have decided to teach our son ourselves. My (and my wife’s) experience with Christian schools has been largely negative—we found them reactionary, anti-intellectual, and, as you affirmed previously, just as depraved as public schools.
All things considered, I appreciate your transparency in considering this topic for us to hear and discuss. May the Lord richly bless you and your family!
25. Amanda
December 12, 2006
1:35 PM
Hm. I plan on homeschooling. I wonder if I’m easily offended. :-D Hey, my hair isn’t quite past my waist yet. Well, it was last year. In fact, it was down to my knees. I got it cut to about halfway down my back (gave the rest to locks of love). And hey, we don’t mind having the kids to Halloween activities! Maybe we’re atypical….or maybe we just think we are.
Seriously, though, our choice wasn’t because we feel it’s the only biblical option. I went to public schools. Except for one year, so did my husband.
The reason I want to homeschool is because I grew up in a public school that had some really great teachers. Unfortunately, the public school system was not very supportive of these teachers. Discipline barely existed. Granted, not all school systems are like this, but it has affected me. There were things that should have been done that weren’t. I have a learning disorder, but wasn’t tested because I was a girl. The schools weren’t very accomodating to those with learning disorders regardless. Some great teachers were also treated badly at my school. Badly and unfairly. I could have gotten a much better education had the teachers been allowed to teach to their full potential.
Second, I can’t say the idea that I can teach freely about God in the curriculum isn’t attractive. However, (while perhaps it should have been) it wasn’t one of the things I thought of when I made this decision.
Third, my children will get more individual attention and be able to go at a pace that suits them better than they would in most public schools.
I’m also aware that homeschooling may not be for us and we may re-evaluate whether or not to homeschool after we try it. Who knows. I hope I can do it though.
Interesting article. I don’t think people should look upon you badly simply for choosing to go the public school route. There are a lot of good public schools out there. You’ve made the choice you felt best for your family.
26. Todd H. from Zeeland
December 12, 2006
1:37 PM
[quote]…whichever way you choose to raise your children, it is the authentic relationship with the Lord that matters most in their lives, not the category of diploma they recieve. [/quote]
I would say, though, that some (not all) children might have a better chance of developing their authentic relationship with the Lord if their “developing years” are spent at a Christian School. Again, I didn’t say all, but since I don’t know if my children will need it or not, I’m going to err on the side of surrounding them with Christ followers. I’m going to do everything I can for them to grow in Christ. Its the same reason I put them in Sunday School. The same reason I censor TV programs, movies, etc.
TH
27. ReformedMommy
December 12, 2006
1:46 PM
As a child I attended both public secular and private pseudo-Christian schools. My high-school years were spent at a private all-girls boarding school in Australia (and before all you dads of girls start thinking “hey, now there’s an idea”, be aware that my school had the reputation for producing the wildest, hardest drinking college freshmen of any in my state, and that’s by Australian standards!)
My college years were spent at The Master’s College, where I was not saved until my second semester. Now I have 3 daughters, one who just began kindergarten at a tiny Christian school where my sister-in-law is her teacher, and one who attends a Lutheran preschool where probably no more than half of the parents are believers.
The best counsel I’ve received was from my sister-in-law, who herself had her kids in every arrangement of schooling throughout their years. It is “one child at a time, one year at a time.” My children have different temperaments and already demonstrate different degrees of spiritual maturity. Different methods of training will most likely be necessary at different times. My goal is to raise children who love God, love people and dedicate their hearts, souls and minds to glorifying Him and loving others. I will with God’s help use all means at my disposal to be faithful in that.
That being said, I have been amazed as my children grow older at how my constant comparisons of their development and maturing with their peers is even more full of simultaneous sinful pride and self-doubt than in my own life! I’m sure looking forward to more of that with this series! :)
28. Desiree
December 12, 2006
1:46 PM
I think this is a “touchy” issue because we’re talking about our children. There are so many factors that go into a decision such as this. We are all trying to raise God-loving children, but our methods will look different in each family. I hope we would avoid sweeping statements like “I would never send my child to public school,” etc.
One of the wonderful things about having christian families choose different methods is that it guards against legalism. Even believers who love grace have different areas of legalism: some use birth control, some don’t, some don’t eat junk food, some would never go to Disney World, some want women to wear only skirts, some never use credit cards, some don’t even own a T.V., and on and on.
We often treat other believers as less if they don’t do what we do in one of the above areas - or even how we educate our children.
I look forward to your article tomorrow, Tim. I know you and your wife are very godly. Our country is changing very rapidly these days, and christian parents have a lot to think about, don’t we?
I do homeschool, and love doing so. But I will not die on that hill. Each child is different, every city is different, every year is different, etc. We need God, not methodologies.
29. yikesmom
December 12, 2006
1:54 PM
Thanks for addressing this, we homeschool our four kids but I can honestly say that we don’t love it all the time. I can also honestly say that we are misfits in our homeschooling community as we have a TV and watch it, go trick-or-treating within our neighborhoods with our neighbors, have birthday parties for our kids with their christian and non-christian friends, don’t use all christian textbooks, etc.
I think that having our kids in public school would actually be easier for us in a lot of ways, but for now it works. The PCA By Faith magazine just addressed this whole topic a few months ago, what a wonderful article that blessed many. I think that whatever a family chooses to do should not be looked upon as the perfect or best idea. That would probably solve a lot of problems in relationships.
I think that anytime we as sinners decide that something (other than God’s grace) will keep our covenant children from falling away from Him will have created an idol and that will not do.
30. Carole
December 12, 2006
1:58 PM
“Maybe this article should have been titled, “Education: A Matter of Liberty/Conscience”. Then, once that was settled, you could follow-up with, “Why I Do Not Homeschool”. Of course, the title, “Why I Do Not Homeschool” is going to offend many simply because the wording will lead them to believe you don’t homeschool your kids due to the disadvantages of homeschooling rather than the advantages of public schooling. Maybe, “Why I Send My Kids to Public School” would be better.”
I ‘second the motion’ to change the title - it would help us easily offended homeschoolers. :)
Tim, I’m curious as to your thoughts in response to the arguments set forward in Dr. Baucham’s essay - and looking forward to reading your next installment.
http://www.voddiebaucham.org/Blog/4778995B-00A2-47D4-A5B5-BD3C720DC96D.html
31. Tom
December 12, 2006
1:58 PM
In the course of this discussion, your readers may wish to consider the following:
Dr. Wayne Grudem’s paper, Biblical Reasons for Sending Children to a Christian School.
and
Bruce Shortt’s book, The Harsh Truth About Public Schools. I have not read Mr. Shortt’s book.
Blessings, everyone, and Merry Christmas!
Tom
Doctrine Matters
32. pduggie
December 12, 2006
2:01 PM
To Christopher’s comment:
Its that kind fo questioning that makes me doubtlful that anyone can discuss these things as matters of conviction without offense. Mr Challies seems to be going in that direction too: If you homeschool from *biblical conviction*, then you do so because you have differing convictions about “how Christians relate to the world”. Mr Challies persumably believes his are the right convictions to have on this matter, which makes the convicted homeschooler mistaken, deluded, or suffering from some other defect.
33. Mike Swalm
December 12, 2006
2:01 PM
Thanks Tim. I was wondering in all of this talk about Christian liberty and freedom (a good thing, by the way) where the place of the community of faith might be. Sure, we are all responsible for our families, but doesn’t choosing to be the church entail involving the community in decisions? are our families “not our own” because we recognize that they belong to God more than to us? And if not ours but God’s, then they belong most fully to the community of God. If this reasoning stands, then shouldn’t our communities of faith be determining the best way to do things “communally” and biblically? I’ve heard too many “well, the Spirit told MY FAMILY ALONE to homeschool or public school or Christian school…” Maybe it’s time for the church to hear what the spirit is saying to the churches. This of course is not to impugn anyone’s belief that the holy spirit is speaking to them individually. what needs to happen, in my view, is the bringing together and public discernment of the holy spirit’s guidance for OUR family.
peace to you all.
mike
34. Will
December 12, 2006
2:11 PM
Just a quick comment for John about profanity, sex, drugs, etc.
I grew up in Christian schools in Atlanta. When I talked to my public school friends about what was going on in my school and the other Christian schools, they said it was at least as bad if not worse than their public schools. The guy who sang next to me in my Christian school choir was arrested along with several others during my sophomore year for a massive Christian school drug ring. There were very few people in my class who did not sleep around, and I can’t even tell you about things that went on in the class room! Profanity was a regular occurrence. And to top it off, it was a terrible education. By the way, that was in all 3 of the Christian schools I attended.
I’m not trying to make a case for or against any form a schooling, but to say that gross sinfulness happens less in Christian schools is probably not accurate. Since I’ve been out of high school for almost 10 years now, I’ve talked to others who grew up in Christian schools, and they all have very similar stories.
By the way, it’s worth noting that many of my homeschooled friends had similar experiences growing up as well.
35. Kelly
December 12, 2006
2:15 PM
I think the conversation lacks something if it stays in the “why I do not” category.
It seems helpful to me to have the conversation in a slightly different manner, “Why I homeschool …”, “Why I send my child to public school…” This is not simply to make it sound more positive.
Having the conversation from the negative like this sounds nearly as defeating as homeschoolers whose reasons for homeschooling are in the negative, “I don’t send my kids to public/christian schools because….this evil and that evil…fill in the blank”.
The centering issue, it seems to me, is “why” we do this or that. In other words, what is your goal and purpose in homeschooling? What is your goal or purpose in public schooling? What ends are we seriously trying to achieve by raising our children in the manner we do. What is the positive, end-outcome, we want achieved in our kids lives?
I could say, “I don’t send my child into a burning building because I do not want my child to be burned or killed.” I could easily and more to the point say, “I send my child to safety because I want my child healthy and alive.” Both are end-outcomes that are related but the perspective and purpose is entirely different.
Finally, the conversation reminds me of the fallacy of “affirming the disjunctive”. This is probably not so completely but might be worth considering to keep from becoming muddled:
I should homeschool or I should use public school.
I use public school.
Therefore, I should not homeschool.
I should homeschool or I should use public school.
I homeschool.
Therefore, I should not use public school.
If these are two contradictions then the argument *might* be valid. If there is possibility that both are true then this is fallacious.
The form of this conversation seems likely lend itself to fallacious thinking.
Grace and Peace,
Kelly
36. pduggie
December 12, 2006
2:16 PM
I agree with Mike Swalm. The church doesn’t speak to this and so “convictions” run rampant.
Another tragedy of the divided body of Christ.
37. Luke
December 12, 2006
2:21 PM
Tim,
WOW…a large response!!!! I am sure the next couple of posts will generate even more. That said, I’ll keep my comment to a minimum.
As a Pastor of a Church full of people who are passionate homeschoolers I feel pretty intimidated. My wife and I have 2 small children under 4. We’ve begun discussing education options. At first I was all for the home-schooling thing, but after much prayer and consideration we’ve made the choice to send our kids to a Christian school for elementary - middleschool and then to the public school in High School. We’ll see if it works that way or not…it will probably depend upon the $$$.
Because we have been led to lean in this direction I fear that, even as the Pastor, I will be looked down upon and maybe even have my character questioned for doing so. I pray the disposition you espoused in your article would be manifest in our Churches. It is a most difficult decision!
38. Van H. Edwards
December 12, 2006
2:25 PM
Thanks for this post, Tim. Will you have to rehash all your caveats tomorrow when you actually post your reasons?
A mother in our church was asked if she home-schooled, and she answered, “Yes, we home-school and every day we send them on a field trip to public school.”
As a public school parent, I appreciate this answer, not just because it’s humorous, but because it reminds all of us Christians, no matter where our children go to school, that we MUST “home school” our children in the faith.
Because of the divide that I’ve seen between the “homers” and public schoolers in my own church, I’ve been trying to interact more with them about education. I’d like to know more about what they do and why - maybe I’ll learn something. Plus, I find that this softens the “split”. Strangely enough, I’ve found a certain percentage of home schoolers don’t necessarily train in any type of biblical education. Some of the curriculum used is “Christian-themed”, but there is no real Bible training.
To them and every other Christian parent, I would say that “Sunday School” should be a supplement to the Biblical training going on at home, not the primary source. If we’re only giving our children 1 hour a week of bible stories, we’re cheating them. When I read , I’m reminded that I need to be instructing my children in the ways of God at home. But, the Bible never addresses where to take my math classes. Like Tim says, it is a matter of conscience where we owe each other much grace, not judgment.
39. Stephanie
December 12, 2006
2:28 PM
I started homeschooling for good reasons, but not out of a god-given conviction. Now it is conviction that keeps me on this path. What changed from just a good idea to a conviction? When I started researching what education really is, biblically. After looking at what God says about education, teaching and making disciples…I cannot send my children to schoool (private or public). I would challenge you to look at the ancient Hebrews contrasted with the Ancient Greeks…and look at the outcome. Homeschooling is the only viable option in my opinion to carry out all that God has asked me and my husband to do.
I feel like I have been called to train warriors for God and I feel like they need a special individualized training to accomplish this. Homeschooling is hard and I don’t always enjoy it, but I know that that is what God has asked of our family.
I know that I am at this position by God’s grace and his leading. I am one of those easily offended homeschool moms! ;) When you choose a path less taken you usually meet opposition, so I seem to always stand ready to defend. I admit it is a weakness for homeschoolers, me especially, and an area in which we all need to improve. I look forward to hear what else you have to say on the subject.
40. DeeDee
December 12, 2006
2:30 PM
I’m 40yrs old and was homeschooled my highschool years. Yep, it was really radical back then! At that time, my mom just thought it was extremely unwise to have 13yr old girls mixing, on a daily basis, with up to 18yr old young men. (I still can’t argue with that statement.) So, she sought out a way to avoid that.
Having said that, I’ve gone the “homeschooling is Biblical” route to, now, feeling it is indeed a freedom issue…although I would call it more a wisdom issue as opposed to a moral issue.
I now have 3 daughters that I have homeschooled from the begining. And although I’m sure I will have more to say on the subject after part 2, I will say this right now.
I believe I could have easily gone through public highschool with a decent education, and not getting into any trouble(i.e. staying physically pure etc). I have a very strong personality, and have never been easily swayed.
However, there is nothing more beautiful that I have ever seen, than the not only physical purity of my 14 and 15 1/2 year olds, but the purity of heart and mind they possess. Although my body possessed purity, my mind was extremely corrupted by the time I was headed into highschool. There were things that I knew and heard and saw that no young girl(or man for that matter) should know, hear or possess until just before marriage or even after marriage that her husband will introduce or explain to her.
I weep with joy when I see their beautiful innocence. Not a gilded cage innoncence, but true and right innoncence that gets completely and utterly robbed by the exposure to, not only un-godly peers, but anti-God peers. I would like to repeat that. NOT a gilded cage innoncence. Please do not think that my daughters are naive and are going to be sadly shocked at the world someday. But, with homeschooling, we have a greater measure(not perfect control) of deciding when and where our children are taught and exposed to certain things.
Anyways…this got longer than I had planned.
Looking forward to the next installment.
41. WES
December 12, 2006
2:32 PM
Tim,
Regarding your reasons for sending your children to be educated by the government system, I’d be curious how you view; ‘Excused Absence: Should Christian Kids Leave Public Schools?’ by Douglas Wilson and Marvin Olasky as well as Wilson in ‘Lost Tools of Learning’ and ‘Repairing the Ruins’.
It states, in the same way you would not send your 2nd grade daughter to a Mormon vacation bible school to ‘be in but not of’ and to be a witness…..so also, for the government controlled system.
42. g-veld
December 12, 2006
2:35 PM
My wife and are going to be enrolling our son in preschool shortly and will be deciding on the Christian/Public school question. Thanks for the posting and comments they provide good perspectives.
My concern is finding a Christian school that believes similar to what I believe. I fear ‘bad’ theology more than ‘no’ theology.
43. Dallas Pymm
December 12, 2006
2:40 PM
I would say at this point I am a freedom guy on this issue but as God has not placed it on my wife and I’s heart to have children I have not pressed the issue all that much. I only have a question to ask anyone willing to answer. Do you think this could be an area where not being unequally yoked with the world might apply and why or why not?
44. Luke
December 12, 2006
2:40 PM
I just can’t help it…I have to add one more thought!
I have been reading some who would like to fancy themselves into the delusion that sin happens less in Christian Schools. This is down right insane. To suppose that the injection of Jesus into our teaching is somehow going to erase the sinful nature of the students is insane. It is the lack of an understanding of the doctrine of sin and a complete delusion (probably uttered by those who feel the need to come up with a spiritual sounding reason to justify paying a lot of money for their kids education).
Kids in Christian schools are no less sinful than kids in public schools. Christian schools may find ways to curtail certain kinds of sins, but if you’ve searched your own soul, read the Mortification of Sin by Owen, and read the scripture at all, you’ll know that stopping sin is like playing the Smack the Mole game at Chuck-E-Cheese. Put one down and anothe pops up in its place. So, the Christian school may smack down on public display of affection, but another sin of similar consequence will replace it.
Not only do we know this in our own lives…this is why many men turn toward porn…but if you have kids you know this to be the case as well. The only benefit that can be recieved from Christian schools is simply that Christ is at the center of the education…that is reason enough to defend the decision, we don’t have to delude ourselves into such fanciful arguments as to the level of sinfulness. Not only that, but homeschooled kids get it too…they see their parents…if my kids see me every day as their teacher, they’re still looking and learning from a sick sinner. We just need to get over the whole thing about sin exposure with our kids. Even those who pride themselves with their carefulness allow their children to purvey their own soul daily ( and if we have any sense of humility and self awareness of our own sin, there’d probably less talk of this nature).
That said, though there is not one verse anywhere in scripture to support this, we are to judge the degree of sin we’ll allow our children to survey. I do think it wise to pursue our own holiness and seek to establish it in the lives of our children. Thus, in the end we must be careful but ultimately trust the sovereign hand of God to preserve and save our kids, not the degree of sin thier exposed to.
45. christopher
December 12, 2006
2:40 PM
Pduggie:
My questions in comment 22 above were not at all meant to cause “offense,” but merely to raise the point that if we view sin not merely as bad deeds (but also as self-righteousness), then this seems to weaken the argument that we should avoid public schools because the kids there are “sinners.” i am a member of a church where parents take advantage of many educational options (homeschool, private Christian, private non-Christian, charter school, public school), although i believe (but am not certain) that most home school. i assume that the parents’ decisions are based on several factors: finances, theological conviction, safety, quality, inlfuence of peers, etc. i do not have any kids, but if i do, i suspect that all of these factors will influence my decision, as well as the maturity, temperament, and degree of discernment displayed by each individual child. Nevertheless, i still maintain that educating my children in the presence of other sinners will be unavoidable regardless of which option i choose—even homeschooling.
46. Kate Sachsay
December 12, 2006
2:50 PM
Absolutely fantastic essay. Look forward to Part 2. Granted, I risk having a beam in my own eye with this comment, but see how many people call public schools “government schools” in the perjorative sense. That makes your point even stronger when they do that. Such spiritual arrogance. It is a paramount reason we too will choose - key word - our city’s wonderful public school.
47. brian @ voiceofthesheep
December 12, 2006
2:53 PM
One of the main reasons we homeschool is that we simply prefer to spend more time with our children than a couple of hours each weeknight and then on weekends.
Judging from my neighbors accross the street whose children attend public school, a child spends approximately eight hours away from home while at school. They then have, on average, two or three hours worth of homework to finish before the next school day. In other words, they are doing something related to school seemingly all day almost right up until bedtime.
Our typical homeschool day consists of about four to five hours of schooling, and that’s it.
By the way…we also participate in Halloween, buy bread from a store, and participate in sports…so I guess we also break the stereotypical mold as well.
ps. I and my wife were both products of the public school system and both came out fine…I guess (that is up for debate). But I also remember some of the things I had to endure that I would not wish upon my worst of enemies.
I don’t look down on parents that go the public school route. I just am thankful to my Creator that He allows our children to spend the majority of their time with me and my wife instead of in the hands of the government education system…not that there’s anything wrong with that. ;)
48. Carole
December 12, 2006
2:58 PM
In response to G-VELD:
“My concern is finding a Christian school that believes similar to what I believe. I fear ‘bad’ theology more than
‘no’ theology.”
Keep in mind that what may appear as ‘no theology’ really does promote a religious perspective of some kind (for example secular humanism, socialism, polythiesm…) We all subscribe to a world view which contains some form of religious belief (even atheism is a kind of ‘faith’). I’m not promoting ‘bad theology’ - just wanted to clarify that there’s ‘theology’ at stake in the public schools, too - they just don’t call it that.
49. Luke
December 12, 2006
3:01 PM
Dallas,
Unequally yoked. Public Schooling as an issue of being unequally yoked…I would say, not applicable.
To be yoked to another is to be under their sole direction. The picture of the yoke in the scripture is used two ways. First, Christ uses it to describe coming under his rule. To be a Christian is to be solely under his leadership, completely under his rule and control. The implication is that if we are under the yoke of Christ that He is our Lord.
The other picture is that of marriage. Paul uses this in 1 Cor. 7 to describe the marriage relationship. That the marriage relationship is to be under the same authority. The implication is that if we are to unite ourselves, intimately, with another, they are to be of like mind regarding the yoke of Christ.
This is the principle: entering into an intimate relationship with another (with Christ, solely committed to Him; with a spouse, united together under Christ).
The whole picture of the yoke is meant for intimate relationships with individuals, not with institutions or systems. This picture is used to describe a relationship with individuals.
That said, I do not think we can use this to evaluate the decision for or against school choices. To do so would require using the principle to apply to things the word of God does not do.
For example. Say I choose to send my child to a public school, but I choose to also educate my child at home and help him evaluate all his learning and, I personally, inject Christ into all the teaching. Let us say, as is common, a child has a Christian teacher who is like minded in his math class. But, then, as was in my case, every other teacher was lost…and some visibly so.
If we are not to have relationship with any system or institution that is not inherently christian, then even a secular job is sinful. But, if we move beyond institutions and begin evaluating individual teachers then we have a problem. So one might be in a position where their kid is publicly educated by teachers that are professing Christians, but homeschooled in all classes that are not taught by Christians. This is not right either…it just simply misses the point.
The point Jesus is making, and the point Paul is making, is extremely intimate. If the degree of intimacy exists with you and your job, school, club, or anyone but your spouse or Christ…your not simply unequally yoked, but in a serious degree of sin beyond that. For your kids…there is a kind of abuse taking place that the Catholic Church has been wrestling with now for some time.
50. jmark
December 12, 2006
3:01 PM
Dallas Pymm wrote
“as God has not placed it on my wife and I’s heart to have children.”
I understand that this may be a sensitive matter, but since you have stated it in open forum I feel I can respond publicly.
I can understand that a couple might be unable to have children, but to willingly say “God hasnt laid it on our hearts - that to me seems to fly in the face of a very direct command to be fruitful and increase in number.
I’m not sure that having children is a matter that needs guidance - the ‘when’ and ‘how many’ are matters of wisdom - but there is no question on the having of them. God’s word is clear. This sentiment seems akin to saying God hasnt laid it on my heart to go to church.
If there are pressing physiological or medical reasons, I understand - and I dont need to know the details. But its just that in counselling a Christian couple recently I came across this came idea - “we’ll have kids if we want to”.
I dont think God has left it up to us to decide
51. deanna
December 12, 2006
3:05 PM
I first want to say that I have greatly enjoyed your post AND the comments. Your post reflects much of what my husband and I believe as well, the comments reflect much of what I would expect to hear.
I, myself, grew up in a Christian home, attended public school and later a Christian college. Both of my parents were public school teachers and I later became a teacher. God lead me to teach in a Christian school, which honestly was my last choice as a career. Having student taught in an inner-city school, my heart was really for the lost and needy, but God had another plan for me.
In my experience as an elementary school teacher in a wonderful Christian school, I realized that for myself the greatest temptation would be as a parent to have a false sense of security about the spiritual needs of my children should I choose to send them to Christian school, let alone homeschool them. The exposure for these children is similar in Christian and public school and for homeschooled children? That mostly depends on how involved the parents choose to be in the world.
My husband and I have launched both our children into public school with a Christian foundation at home and strive to instill in them all the spiritual armor and weapons they will need to prepare them for each and every battle. The lessons we have learned together, whether it be inappropriate discussions, mistreatment of others or profanity, are extremely valuable in my opinion. I can’t imagine that I would be able to recreate any of these same lessons at home.
That is not to say that if I felt my child was receiving an education that did not meet her needs that I wouldn’t consider homeschooling, but at this point, I have yet to feel myself convicted that it would be better for my children. There are days when the I think to myself that I don’t want to deal with the issues any longer in public school and think about throwing in the towel. I am reminded that I’m not doing this alone, that the power within us if far greater, that our light in that darkness needs to stay lit. Our influence goes far beyond just our children, it continues with us, our relationships with staff and other parents and the children that our kids befriend.
I’m quite comfortable with our decision and but for the random criticism of homeschooling or Christian schooling friends, I have for the most part felt supported by parents of all different positions. This is our fourth year with our two girls in public school and I was reminded at our first conference why we made this choice. As I was leaving my daughter’s classroom, there on the wall behind her teacher’s desk were the fruits of the spirit, written out by my daughter, posted for all to see as behavior worth striving for. I’m on my toes, alert for my children and that is where God wants us!
52. Elizabeth
December 12, 2006
3:13 PM
Hi Tim,
Unless you receive loads of comments on this topic, I’m curious to know your motivation for writing this piece, since the tone sounds a bit demeaning and suggestive of “I’m the stronger Christian”- as if you have something to prove/explain. I think it reads this way because of your use of phrases such as:
“This is an area of weaker and stronger Christians.”
I respectfully disagree with this highly definitive statement (and most definitive statements unless they come from scripture or a mathematics textbook- a man once said, ‘To be conscious that you are ignorant is a great step to knowledge.”)
You also wrote, “Homeschooling parents are easily offended (See? I offended you just by saying that!).”
Ugh, another definitive statement… In my opinion, people who are “easily offended” are so because they are constantly on the defense from their attackers… and in case you’re wondering “No”, I’m not a homeschooler nor did I grow up homeschooled.
I’m guessing from the tone of this piece and the replies your audience is mostly suburban?
And, I’m curious in Canada do you have to deal with school zoning laws? I ask because my family lives in New York City and we do not live in the greatest neighborhood; therefore, the public schools which my children would have to attend are sub par and down right scary. Several of the schools in poor neighborhoods here have no AC in the summer and no heat in the winter. Additionally, there are several cases of girls who engage in transactional sex for protection from gangs. Clearly for safety, health and other concerns we would not send our children to public schools in our neighborhood. This has nothing to do with being “weak”- we could care less if our children go to a secular or Christian (incl. Catholic) private school as long as it is safe and they will actually learn.
I also teach ESL at an after-school program in the Bronx, it is not only the students who curse and make violent threats but the teachers do as well. I have heard it repeatedly and this is not an acceptable environment for a child.
Lastly, you mentioned you went to private school and experienced pornography, profanity etc. there. I also went to private school and even though I couldn’t stand the teachers, I was never exposed to any type of pornography or profanity, which makes me believe this entire debate is highly subjective.
Just a thought, maybe in the future someone could read over your pieces for a “loving tone” and “loving motivation” before posting pieces such as this.
Warm regards,
Elizabeth
53. Charley
December 12, 2006
3:16 PM
Tim,
I have seen the comment by Doug Wilson before and find it incredibly offensive. (Gee…must be one of those touchy homeschoolers!) Look at the emotional words he uses to make derogatory comments about people who are of strong conviction about the way they organize and run their families: first he calls them a name (homer), then he uses the terms “extremist” and “radical.” Mr. Wilson is usually a fine debater and author. But in this case, he falls into the same trap as most liberals…group those with whom you disagree by using a derogatory name and then add a label, making sure it includes the words “extreme” and “radical.” That pretty much stops any argument right there.
You were trying very hard to be fair and even-handed in your post…but Mr. Wilson’s quote trashes every effort you made.
The method any Christian uses to educate his child is not a matter of salvation or Christian essentials. There is freedom here. But whatever one does, he should be convinced in his own mind that he has solid, Scripture directive for his action. Personally, I do believe there are good, solid Biblical reasons for educating your children at home and I do believe there are good, solid Biblical reasons for NOT sending them to a public school. And I do believe there is the area of jurisdiction of the family that has been woefully ignored, weakened and encroached upon in modern times, especially by the government. Will I believe you are wrong for sending your children to public school? Because of my beliefs…Yes. (Consider for a minute that my family and I have made our decisions based on conviction. If I didn’t believe what I was doing was based in Scripture, I wouldn’t be doing it. Therefore it stands to reason that I have to believe it is wrong to do otherwise. For me to say it is OK for you to public school is to say that my Scriptural reasons for homeschooling are not valid. In other words, where a dichotomy such as this exists, for me to say you are correct means I must be wrong…just as it would mean that you must be wrong if you admit that I am correct.) Is it my business to dump on you for it? NO! This would be an issue where we should all employ Christian courtesy and grace to each other (something Mr. Wilson didn’t do). There are appropriate places for a debate. For instance, if we were friends and having a discussion, I would certainly try to persuade you.
Do these views make me radical or extreme? Sadly, I guess it does in Mr. Wilson’s eyes. Oh well….
Check out my blog to see how truly “extreme” I am….
Blessings.
Charley
54. Dallas Pymm
December 12, 2006
3:22 PM
Thanks for the reply Luke. That seems to make sense to me as I was also making the connecting with the job issue as well.
I also appreciate the concern you expressed jmark. Your kind loving tone was very encouraging for a discussion. The two times scripture references a command to be fruitful and multiply it is to a distinct family (Adam and Eve, Noah) each time directed to the only family on earth. I just don’t see how this applies to a 21st century Christian with a world population of over a billion. Get my drift? I realize children are a great blessing from experience with children and from scripture, but I don’t think this equals a demand to have children. It will certainly free my wife and I to do other forms of ministry, which I think a family qualifies as, to not choose to be blessed with children. As with the choice to homes cool or not, I feel the choice to have children or not is also a matter a Christian freedom.
Sorry Tim. I did not mean for this to come up like this, I have no problem talking about this if you don’t. :o)
55. carissa
December 12, 2006
3:23 PM
i know next to nothing about parenting and i’m at least several years away from having children, but i have been in school for 15 years straight so i’m going to write this anyway.
at 19 years old i had my very first experience with private Christian education after california public schools for my entire k-12 career, as well as a year and a half of a california public university. Christian college opened up a whole new world - on the one hand, an amazing world of chapels, Godly professors praying for us, and 30 units of bible classes; on the other hand, a much smaller, less diverse world where hypocrisy and apathy were disappointingly easy to find. thankfully, i haven’t seen much gross licentiousness (some, of course, but not as much as public school). still, it was quite an adjustment. in public university, (good) Christians tend to take their public testimony seriously; at Christian university, people too often tend to treat each other as poorly as we let each other get away with, because ‘there’s no one to impress.’ all in all, each side has its advantages and disadvantages. i like Christian university very well and i don’t regret coming here at all.
i’ll add that i have no experience with homeschool whatsoever, and since i turned out okay without it i suppose that fairly convinces me that it’s not THE necessary way to do education. however, one thing i do agree with is that spiritual, moral, and even social education originates in the home (and church), so that WHERE academic education takes place matters much less than WHO the child being educated is, and HOW s/he has been raised.
56. dime/dozen
December 12, 2006
3:25 PM
So subjective, so subjective. Like many ‘issues’ it seems this one is simply fun to talk about, to hear ourselves pontificate and ramp up our opinions for, I guess, the sake of arguement. Like shaking up a bottle of pop and handing it to an unsuspecting friend to open.
While it has been stated ( and I agree with the scolding for the inflamatory title choice, given what he went on to say…just my ‘opinion’) that Tim qualifies and pre-empts his statements with Romans 14 logic, which is fine if what we are talking about is the contemplation of what might be considered a ‘sin’…what this approach tends to achieve with a topic like this is the deepening of distinctions, aggravating defensiveness. While it is not stated outright in Tim’s defense of public school ‘choice’, what is implied by his defense is his own version of moral high ground which, just by striking up the conversation, reveals underpinnings of judgement and superiority…not unlike the treatment experienced by judgemental homeschoolers.
The reasons for exercising any of the educational methods are as varied as the parents, teachers, and children involved. If someone choses to utilize one instead of the other there are going to be positive and negative ramifications…period. A poor teacher and a slouching system can harm and disappoint to the same degree that an ineffective parent can stunt and disadvantage a child. Likewise, an excellent teacher OR an excellent parent can provide positive influences and growth oppotunities for a child…WHILE disadvantaging in some ways.
The question is not about pros and cons of methods, rather, ‘What is the best choice for my unique child, given what is available.’ I know parents and teachers and children involved in all three approaches. ALL good…and bad. We make most decisions for our children based upon what we believe about our experiences. Our fears become their fears to the same degree that our ‘ideals’ become their ideals…temporarily. Later, the child must make their own, often opposing, decisions based upon what they experienced from their parents and how they feel and think about its affect on their current reality.
When making a decision, realizing how many variables factor into the process, a parent would do well to research their schools, interview the teachers, self-assess their own aptitude, then factor in their time/financial restriants…and then make a decision based upon what THEIR particular child in THEIR particular situation would benefit from the most. This is not a better than/worse than situation…therefore expending energy generating dialogue defending positions scuttles understanding of how children develop and introduces polarities paramount to ‘class’ distinctions. Entirely subjective! We, as parents, AND the ‘world’ will superimpose values upon our children. As they grow they must ‘sort out’ and fill in the blanks for themselves. A parent benefits their child by by teaching them to THINK about how they are engaging with ALL of life…regardless of socio-economic positioning. Any pop left in the can? And yes, I have children…but no I’m not going to say how they are being schooled.
57. Todd H. from Zeeland
December 12, 2006
3:30 PM
I found the link in post #32 to Dr. Wayne Grudem’s paper,
Biblical Reasons for Sending Children to a Christian School.
very convincing and biblically based. I would like to see someone dispute his paper.
58. pduggie
December 12, 2006
3:32 PM
Sorry Christopher:
I misunderstood your questions as implying that homeschoolers were ignorant (deliberately or not) of the idea that sin can take manifold forms, and were actually choosing pharasaical sin as lesser of two evils.
It still seems to me that if Homeschooling/Christian schooling is dicussed from the perspective of biblical conviction or theological principle its inherently a win/lose kind of argumen; and if one tries to put it into the prudence category, those with convictions lose the argument as lacking prudence because they do it from conviction.
59. Daniel
December 12, 2006
3:37 PM
Homeschooling isn’t for everyone.
When our eldest was still two or three years old I found myself puffed up with pride at how intelligent he seemed to be. I began to insist upon a correct annunciation and articulation of the English language, and my constant correction caused such anxiety in him, that he still has something of a stutter to this day - to my shame.
In a loving way, at that time, my dear wife - God bless her - took me aside and instructed me in an area where I had been quite blind. She explained with a profound reasoning and clarity that in the future, when my son turned ten he would speak just like all the other ten year old boys, and whatever efforts I made now to instill perfect diction in him could have one, and only one lasting effect - and that he would grow up with a sense that he could never please me, and eventually he would quit trying.
She suggested that I sit down and carefully consider what I want my son to be as a man, and what sort of relationship I want to have with my son when he was grown, and then to act in a way that would not hinder that.
It was a defining moment in my life, because when I did stop and consider, I realized that I didn’t want my son to make all the same errors in his life that I had made in mine. I wanted my son to love the Lord with all his heart, and to be happy. I really didn’t care if he was a billionaire or a pauper, I knew that God would look after feeding and clothing him - all I wanted was for my boy was a life dependant on the Lord, and consequently, a life of unfeigned and perpetual joy.
Homeschooling came quite naturally after that - as both myself and my wife had worked in the public school system and felt that being raised by a band of peers - and a secular band at that - while it may not destroy our efforts to raise our children in the joy of the Lord - it certainly wouldn’t help it.
We were as deceived about our own avarice as most are today - we wanted the big house, and we felt we couldn’t get by on just one income - but I put my trust in the Lord, sold our big old idol (house), and bought something more within our means - and now we find that we have as much as we need, and even plenty to give.
My father used to work for an order of Jesuit priests, I still recall with cold clarity the day my father told me about something one of the Jesuits had said - and this was before I knew the Lord, “Give us a boy as a babe, and let us bring him up to the age of eight years old, and he will be a Jesuit the rest of his life” - they understood that proverb about bringing up a child in the way he is to go. They understood that indoctrination is most effective when it happens at an early age.
Our decision to homeschool therefore was also influenced by this concern regarding the inevitability of a peer-driven, secular indoctrination, regardless of how effective it was. If we could homeschool until the age of at least nine or ten we felt we would have avoided a lot of the problems we were most concerned about.
As it turns out however, we noticed that where our children remained best friends as they grew up, yet we saw their peers in other families immediately separate from themselves from their siblings - making a distinction between family and friend - you are my sister, not my friend - my friends have to be in the same grade, and class as me, and even the same gender - that is how everyone else does it, and so it must be right, and mom and dad can’t change that. We would have never even noticed this sort of ugly attitude had we not been homeschooling - yet there it was, not amongst the homeschooled, but amongst the institutionalized - their value system, bit by bit was being programmed into them by “the system.” If the teacher says this is okay, all the students must agree, and anyone who doesn’t is to be ostracized and ridiculed.
As a homeschooler, I am certain that I have a clear and present bias - I am convicted that I cannot put my little ones into a system that works against what we are trying to do as parents.
That being said, I have some respect for the faith of those people who choose public school not out of ease or avarice, but because they are mature enough (spiritually) to put their little ones into the world’s maw and not flinch - even when they know the child to be at an age when they are most impressionable, most vulnerable, and most susceptable to corruption.
It is much easier for me to imagine that most people are simply not that mature, and that the decision to use public schools happens either by default, or because the parents believes that God won’t provide for them a standard of living that suits them unless both parents have a job.
Boy, when you are willing to be poor, only then can you be truly rich.
60. christopher
December 12, 2006
3:47 PM
Well, Pduggie, my questions WERE meant to imply that *some* homeschoolers are ignorant “of the idea that sin can take manifold forms, and were actually choosing pharasaical sin as lesser of two evils.” (Although i am not persuaded that pharasaism is the lesser evil.) But this myopia is in no way limited to homeschoolers. But please note, i did NOT suggest that this was true of ALL or even a majority of home-schooling parents. However, this has been true of some that i have known. If this is not true of you, then no need to take offense. i just do not find the “limited exposure to sin” argument to be very persuasive in favor of homeschooling or private Christian schooling. But i would also hasten to add that some of those Christian parents who send their (often) un-regenerate and undiscerning young children to public schools as young missionaries may be fooling themselves.
61. WES
December 12, 2006
4:00 PM
My wife and I are leaning in the homeschooling direction mainly due to the following general ideas;
‘Not saying anything about God from 8-3pm, 5 days a week, 9 months(in public education) says a lot about God. It teaches children that God either does not exist or he is irrelevant. ’
-I think R.C. Sproul
The book ‘Total Truth’ by Nancy Pearcy resonates with this idea showing the mental/spiritual dualistic notation people often miss. Meaning; God is only at church and home, instead of everywhere…..even in physics class.
‘I advise no one to place his child where the Scripture do not reign paramount. I am much afraid that schools will prove to be the great gates of hell unless they diligently labor in explaining the Holy Scriptures engraving them in the hearts of youth.’
-Martin Luther
‘Education is never religiously neutral.’
-R.L. Dabney
‘Because our kids belong to God, are we called to surround them with a biblical worldview from the time
they get up to the time they go down, including the hours from 8:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m.? Education is essentially religious. Education deals with the basic questions of life, and those questions require a religious answer. Learning to read and write gives people the tools to ask and answers such questions. But our schools fail even in this task’.
-Douglas Wilson in ‘The Case For Classical Christian Education’
62. PuritanD
December 12, 2006
4:06 PM
Tim,
This is a great topic of discussion.
My wife and I were raised in the public school systems (except my 3rd/4th grade). For the most part we were determined to have our own kids go through the public school system as well.
We have had a difficult time in deciding whether to home school or not. I think that every option is viable to Christians. I also believe that each area and criteria used to make such decisions are different.
The school system we are in now is one that may as one commentor mentioned have a worldview that is in opposition to Christianity. If I have to tell my child everyday why such things being taught in school is at best misleading if not wrong, why redo and correct when it may be better to give it to them right the first time. Why have a constant battle between the authority of teachers vs. parents in education.
Would we send our kids to public school in the near future if we move out of the area? Probably! We would love to homeschool for a few years and then send them out to the public school, but we are in a ‘wait and see’ pattern.
I think that the questions present by Chris (22) are somewhat simplictic. I am not deeply concerned about peer influence. I am concerned about the possible battles of worldviews of teachers vs. worldview of parents who both are in positions of authority and have tremendous influences on kids.
Being a youth pastor, I am constantly dealing with and challenging the beliefs that the jr. and sr. high kids bring with them from school. Most kids are from a Christian household. Yet, I spend a great amount of time (willingly) in correcting mistaken beliefs of reincarnation, eveloution, and social/enviromental issues. When pitted against what teachers say verse what the Bible says, generally teachers win the day.
Granted, I do have a few kids that are so well grounded that they do “roll the eyes” to their teachers, but they complain that school is a waste of time because they are not learning anything. I think there are a variety of factors that are involved and each parent needs to take them all into account when making their decisions.
Respectfully,
PuritanD
63. Noel
December 12, 2006
4:11 PM
Wow. Commentpalooza. Your post prompted one of my own. You can read the whole thing here. For the purpose of brevity, I’ll just post an excerpt on your site.
The context is my wife and I homeschool for K and 1st Grade, and then send our kids to public school.
****
Now…why are we home-schooling for the first couple years? Many home-school families are shocked to find out it has almost nothing to do with our faith.
The primary reason we home-school for the first few years? My wife was a public school teacher and she has seen how the first few years can be an academic wasteland. And with her qualifications, she can teach our kids so much more the first couple years. Our hope is that it will give our kids a head start academically. So far, with Emma and Jesse, this has proven to be the case. They are both in public school and are doing exceptionally well academically.
Ethan is halfway through Kindergarten and he is reading and writing already.
The secondary reason we home-school for the first few years? We want to disciple our kids a bit more before exposing them to public school. We feel like 5 years old is a little premature to send them into the world. This is a deliberate choice. What do I mean by exposing them to public school? Well, after Emma’s first day of public school, I asked her how it went.
Her response?
“A boy said I was hot.”
Now that would be reason enough to yank her from public school all together for many people. But it is precisely the reason we have decided to send them into school in third grade. We want our kids to live in the world at the same time they are living in our house. We want them to come home and ask us what swear words mean. We want them to come home and tell us about their experiences in culture, because it will afford us with an opportunity to frame their experiences with a missional world-view.
64. Dallas Pymm
December 12, 2006
4:27 PM
“A boy said I was hot.”
I think it is widely accepted that father of said girl has the right to inflict pain on said boy for said comment. God bless you all who have girls…I would rip my hair out worying about boys looking at them. :o)
65. John R.
December 12, 2006
4:59 PM
Tim,
I appreciate the discussion, and think it’s a worthwhile topic that needs to be discussed calmly, which is difficult for many on both sides of the divide these days.
First, to put my cards on the table, we’ve been homeschooling our children for almost 10 years now. Still, many of your (and the commenters’) criticisms of homeschoolers are on the mark. As a homeschooler, I frequently find myself in opposition to the judgmental, isolated, neo-Amish mentality of too many of our ilk. But it’s also fair to note that while the common sentiment here going in seems to have been, “Thanks for the comments, Tim. Now—duck!!!” all of the comments here seem to be quite civil so far.
Now, for the point I feel needs to be made, which pertains to the reasons we do homeschool our kids. In another post, you recently wrote:
“Statistics show that many Christians, and most likely the vast majority of Christians, have a worldview that is functionally secular. Many people who go to church every Sunday, who read Christian books and who read their Bibles and pray every day, still think like unbelievers. Their worldview—their way of seeing and understanding the world—is no different from before they claimed to be Christians. As interesting as statistics may be, common sense and good reason show the problem to be severe. Jonathan Edwards, looking to the refusal of the people of his day to own up to their guilt, realized that ‘the liberal Christianity of the new republic would be built around such moral principles.’ Modern day evangelicalism is likewise founded on such moral principles.”
Exactly! I couldn’t agree more. But Tim, wouldn’t we be more than a bit naive if we didn’t make any connection between this state of affairs and our public school system? Where do you suppose most Christians got that functionally secular worldview? Have you not provided a strikingly apt description of “non-sectarian” public education through the decades, which has (until recently) taught “moral principles” while excluding theology? And is it possible —since this is a manifest problem, and one that we modern Christians have major blind spots on—that weighing between Christian education and some other kind of education as if both were equally valid options for Christian children could be one very potent manifestation of that “functionally secular worldview?”
Ultimately, we cannot hide our children from sin, as if sin were something “out there.” That’s legalism, and it fails to recognize that kids have no problems sinning in any environment. I completely agree with you and everyone who’s expressed that. The reason we homeschool is because we don’t want our children to grow up with functionally secular worldviews, which is all too often the result of the implicit lesson when, say, God and math are separated, or when God is just glossed onto whatever is already presumed to have been taught incompletely but correctly (i.e. “Okay, Billy, you spent six hours today learning biology, math, and history from an atheistic perspective as if they were each closed systems, without any need for recourse to God in the discussion. But just let me add something—God created all that!”).
But I appreciate your thoughts, and my hope is that tomorrow you will present a positive case for public schooling your children, as opposed to merely the negative case against homeschooling.
66. DLE
December 12, 2006
5:12 PM
Oh, Tim.
I blog on homeschooling issues from time to time. No topic has been more incendiary on my blog. I could write that everyone’s going to hell except blue-eyed Lutheran Swedes and I’d get fewer flaming comments than if I said that perhaps homeschooling isn’t the best choice for every family.
Good luck. I wouldn’t be surprised if your comment section went over two hundred posts at some point. My last post on homeschooling had me deleting angry comments, the first time in five years of blogging I had to resort to that tactic.
If anyone’s interested, most of what I’ve written on the topic can be found through this link:
More on Homeschooling
Hang in there. Once some “homer” homeschooling sects discover your posts, you may be in for a bumpy ride.
B