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Prayer as Duty and Delight
- 01/26/09
- 30
At Grace Fellowship Church we’ve been praying for something big and we’ve been praying it for quite some time. We want a meeting place of our own. It’s not that there is anything inherently wrong with the school we meet in now, but more that we can foresee how our own building would be beneficial to the church and to the community. Oh, and we want the building to be free. We’re quite a small church and the leadership (wisely, I think) is hesitant to rope the church into a long and expensive mortgage. Real estate prices being what they are in Toronto, it would realistically be a very long and undoubtedly very expensive mortgage. This would not be a good decision for our church. So we continue to pray for a building of our own, for free.
I am confident that we can pray for such a thing and am confident that God can answer our prayer in amazing and unexpected ways. And really, I’ve seen him answer such prayers in other churches and organizations. The Apostle had confidence that God was able to do things far beyond our ability to even imagine, closing his prayer for the Ephesians by praying in the name of “him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” What seems so big to us is so small to God. Is the Creator of all the universe bound by the limitations that seem so clear to us?
It’s strange to me, then, that I can pray in such confidence that God is able to do great things and yet still pray with such a diminished sense of my prayers actually mattering to God. I am coming to realize that this is one of my great struggles in prayer. I believe in God’s sovereignty; I believe what he says in the Word is true and that he is not only able, but willing to grant what I ask in prayer. “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” God wants to hear the prayer of his saints and as a father delights in giving good things to his son, God delights in giving good things to his children.
And yet so often I pray like it doesn’t really matter. I make it a habit to try to pray for every person in our church every week. Far too often I pray these prayers like I am praying to someone who is not eager to hear the prayers and is not eager to answer them. I pray like I am asking difficult things of a reluctant ruler. I pray like I need to beg God that he will bless these saints, like he is uninterested in hearing my requests that these people will apply to their lives the Word they heard on Sunday or that they will come to church eager to enjoy communion with him. I pray like prayer is a duty, not a delight.
But lately God has been showing me that prayer can be so much more than duty. When prayer is mere duty I see myself falling into the trap of the Gentiles that Jesus talked about in his Sermon: “And when you pray, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do, for they think that they will be heard for their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.” My prayers can be so empty, so meaningless, little more than empty phrases heaped one upon the other. But God has been showing me that they are so much more. They are so much more to him.
So this has been my prayer in recent days—my prayer with which I begin to pray. “God, help me to have confidence that my prayers matter.” I’ve found that such a sense can transform a prayer. With such a prayer I am reminding myself of God’s truth—that He is eager to hear and answer my prayers—and I am asking him to give me a renewed and enlarged sense of this great truth. As I pray this I am reminding myself that God is no petty tyrant disinterested in what I may desire to ask him, but that he is a gracious Father who desires good things for all of his children. And I remind myself that prayer is a means, and often the means, by which he gives us those things that will bless us and bring glory to his name.
Prayer matters—my prayers matter. I fight to keep this in my mind and I fight to keep it in my heart.
I am a follower of Jesus Christ, a husband to Aileen and a father to three young children. I worship and serve as a pastor at 
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Comments (30)
Great post. Thank you for sharing.
Tim,Thank you for this. My prayer of confidence that my prayers matter to God is for one of my kids to come to Christ and as a ministry wife, that is a hard one to admit. He has been raised in an evangelical home, where God’s Word has been honored and preached from the pulpit every Sunday by his dad. He knows the way. So, I’m like the father of the prodigal son, watching on the horizon for him to come home, because I trust in a sovereign all knowing God who not only cares about my prayers, but about my child.
This is for you Jody,
I am a pastor whose 29 year old son has an appointment with a Federal Judge this Wednesday. He was raised in a home as you have described. For the last fifteen years he did not attend church. He lived with the mother of my two grandsons without the benefit of marriage while he “hustled” to make ends meet. But through the agony of it all, we have seen a complete turnaround. We have the son we thought we would never have. His is a true conversion. He is in church every time the doors are open, even the not-so-well attended prayer meeting. And if you can believe this, he has started reading Calvin’s Institutes with a small group we call The Sunday Circle.
Only God could do this. And if God can do it for my son he certainly is able and willing to do it for your son. Do not stop praying! Do not give up! A mother’s tears are dear to God.
Allan
Hi Tim,
I always love your posts. I was thinking about your post today. And I was reminded of where Paul says: “Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought:” I wonder if we often come to God with a particular prayer in mind, rather than praying “Thy will be done.” I am not trying to condemn your church’s prayers. Rather, I am just always seeking a more Biblical basis for prayer. May God bless your dear church as He sees fit, and as only He can!
A friend just sent me this link:
Thornwood/Knightswood FCC
Tim, I love the expression of your desire for prayer that depends upon Gods sovereign power.
Ps, don’t just settle on the first free building God offers…jk.
Our church is the same situation, except I don’t think property costs is quite what it is in Toronto as here in Edmonton.
How wonderful that God is blessing His churches in this way!
Wow! This really hit me this morning! I was not even really aware that I was feeling this way, but reading your post made me reevaluate my prayer life and HOW I should be praying. Thanks for the words of encouragment!
Xandra
Tim, I came across this review and thought about you and this post.http://www.reformedbooks.net/review_faith.php
Tim,
I certainly have the same struggle. I appreciate this post as I have decided that my one, major spiritual goal this year is to grow in prayer.
I’ve always envied those who seem naturally “good” at praying. It was never me, but I hope it will be soon.
Sovereignty and responsibility in election and reprobation trip me up. Help me understand:
It seems like praying for the salvation of the unregenerate is “out of bounds” insofar as altering the divine will. When were the names written in the Book of Life? Are names still being penned? Do our petitioning prayers affect which name will be the next to go down?
Are the elect subject to change, or are they, once and for all, a definite sum of souls? No one knows who God’s elect are. How can praying for a person’s salvation be anything but a shot in the dark or a groping in the dark? Are the doctrines of election and reprobation subject to the fervency of prayers?
The idea of being God’s marionette is not comforting yet I am growing comfortable with it. Election and reprobation are very hard to swallow but I refuse to choke on them. The divine will is an unstoppable force. Prayer for my friends and family may make me feel delighted and dutiful, but God’s will bends for no one.
the Devil’s advocate
Tim,Very nice post on prayer; prayer is powerful and God will provide all that is needed for His glory.
I know that a ‘church’ is not a building but a community of believers but I am amazed at how many churches do not own their own building. Up until four years ago my church (a Spanish language church) was meeting in the old sanctuary of a mega-church and it was difficult. We had a 15 minute window to setup and we would arrive to find things had broken or were missing. We were a low priority so, for example, if the choir needed extra music stands they would take them from the old sanctuary and although there was no malice on their part, we would have to do without until we could track them down. Also, I would have to bring my gear (guitar amp & bass amp) for rehearsal and again for the service since we couldn’t have a locker of any sort to leave them in. On the other hand, the idea of a building that only gets used for a few hours twice a week is sickening to me.
Let me tell you of God’s providence and how we came to be in our building. About four years ago I got a new boss at my day job and we started talking about church. I was telling him about the ministry and where we met, and out of the blue he said “do you want to buy a church building?” He was the chairman at his church and they had built a new building recently and still owned the old one. I just said I wasn’t in a position to buy a building and it wasn’t my place to speak for the ministry. A few weeks later I learned that the pastor had been looking for a building and the real estate agent had been trying to ‘hard ball’ them into making a big offer quick, on this very same building, since her contract was running out. When they told me where the building was I told them I work with the guy who is charge of selling it and we can get into see it any time we want.
So we leased the building with an option to buy and if we could get financing by the end of the year all of the lease payments would count toward the purchase. We needed to come up with the down payment and weren’t even close when in the eleventh hour we got a single donation for more than the entire down-payment. God had not only provided the right connections but he found the money. So, it may not have been free but God made it possible every step of the way - keep praying!God bless,-jim
Devil’s Advocate (aka Jake),
This link may prove helpful in sorthing out some things concerning Divine Sovereignty and our human responsiblity (delightful duty) to pray: http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Articles/ByDate/1976/1475_The_Sovereignty_of_God_and_Prayer/
Concerning our/my lack of faithfulness to pray, I would have to agree with George Muller, who concluded that pride or self-sufficieincy was his greatest hindrance to praying. A humble and contrite heart is one that bows itself frequently and fervently in petitioning the one whom we depend on for life and breath and everything.
cliff
Tim,
Your concerns about prayer are shared by many in Christendom. If you’ll excuse my rambling here, I’m reminded of a humorous and very poignant story. Perhaps someone could share the original if they have it or can find it on the internet. Here’s my outline of it:
A very young girl is saying a prayer, perhaps at bedside, and her observer (parent?) notes that she very earnestly has her hands clenched together, and her eyes tightly shut, as she prepares to present her desires to the Lord. She then begins to say her ABCs very slowly and intently from the beginning to the end. And when finished with her prayer she was asked why she had presented the alphabet to God? Her response was a stunning statement of a pure and simple (dare I say childlike?) faith! She replied that God would know her heart’s desire and that the alphabet was her way of leaving it all to God to decide what it was that she needed, And if she needed anything at all.
I apologize for not having the original story. But if it is worthy, I’m sure that someone may post it here later. I also hope you will discern my point in sharing this story? That a heartfelt prayer to God is never a waste of time and effort. Our motivation may be wrong or right. And our perceived need may be real or not real. And God’s answer to our prayer may not be to our liking. But either way we can be absolutely certain that the answer will be for His glory and be 100% compatible with His plan for us.
Dear Jake (a.k.a. Devil’s Advocate)
So far as I know, scripture does not delineate nor discriminate regarding the efficacy of fervent prayers of believers (the saints) and the prayers of Jesus Christ. With this in mind, we see the request in Matthew 26:39 (NIV) 39”My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me.” We know that Christ knew the will of the Father perfectly. And with perfect humility, he subordinated His request of relief to the will of the Father by ending His prayer just as we all should do: “Yet not as I will, but as you will.”
The fact that a prayer to an all knowing God can make a difference is no surprise to me. To paraphrase: He knew the end before there was a beginning.
In Christ,
Dan…
Very good, the Piper article is sharp, thank you.
The point remains that the same ‘will’ that saw fit to save me from my sin never knew those family and friends who have died in their rebellion, in spite of all our prayers. They do not belong to God, He never knew them. It is a ripping reality that Scripture gives no apology for (not that it needs to); God chooses some and not others. Subjecting our will to God’s for the salvation of our loved ones, even our children, is an awful challenge. The Christian’s will is always being conformed to the Father’s but some days I just have to resist. Why me and not them?
Jake,
I too have struggled with the dilemma of prayer as it relates to God’s will (sometimes referred to as “The Puritan Dilemma”). I have found a quote from Jonathan Edwards that has been helpful to me over the years:
“God has been pleased to constitute prayer to be antecedent to the bestowment of mercy; and he is pleased to bestow mercy in consequence of prayer, as though he were prevailed upon by prayer. When the people of God are stirred up to prayer, it is the effect of his intention to show mercy.”
Allan
Certainly this is providence. I just listened to Piper’s “prayer” sermon last night and committed myself to a morning of meaningful prayer. After some reading time in the last chapters of Zechariah I enjoyed 20 mins of praying in the presence of the Almighty. Proved to be a very fruitful ordeal within about an hour afterward. Thanks for bolstering our view of prayer and be encouraged…it works. It works to bring about God’s perfect will in our lives.
Jake,I guess that I have found over the years that I have need to leave this issue in God’s hands for it is beyond me to understand and He has not chosen to reveal it in His word. What He has revealed is that He loves all of His created beings and has made all of them in His image. He has also revealed that He desires that all should be saved and that He loved the lost enough to send His only begotten Son to save them.If He has such a heart for the lost and has paid such a price than shouldn’t we too have a love for them and at least be willing to pay the price of at least a few seconds a day praying that they too might be redeemed?I think that we need to quit trying to figure out who is ‘elect’ and who in not and leave that in our Loving, Gracious and Merciful Fathers hands were it belongs and just rest. He knows and we don’t, at some point I had to get comfortable with that.Hope you find His rest in this issue.In Christ,Saint Dave
Prayer. Perhaps the most difficult “discipline” of them all, for reasons far too complex to list here. My heart breaks over my inability to commune with my Father in any consistent, meaningful, faith-filled way. I’m more than willing for “prayer to change me” (rather than clinging to the thought that ‘prayer changes things’) - and my Sunday School class can attest to the frequency of my reminders that it isn’t “prayer” that changes anything, but rather the God to Whom we pray…BUT…
I cannot seem to get beyond the fact that around the world I have brothers and sisters in Christ who are suffering terribly under torturous, malignant regimes and governments. They are starving, they are dying, they are suffering - for the cause of Christ. If my Father is allowing them to suffer so, for His sovereign purposes, His glory, and their eternal reward - how can I have any faith at all that He will answer my prayers for provision, for the salvation of my family, for the spiritual health of my church, for my own growth in grace and Christ-likeness? If His means to attain those things is my own persecution and suffering, then so be it - but how do I then pray - with faith? And when does faith cross over into presumption?
I can hardly bear the typical “prayer requests” that routinely surface during prayer meetings and Sunday School classes. Without exception, they are for someone’s physical health, or perhaps a straying family member. Never have I heard a request for spiritual maturity, discernment, wisdom, growth, deeper understanding of His Word, or any other “growth in grace” concept. And again, my mental comparison is with Christians in Orissa, India, or Zimbavwe or Iraq or Israel. What do they pray for?
I’m sorry, far too long a comment - but I hurt for my shallowness and ineffectiveness in prayer - and for the apparent lack of same in our overfed, over-comfortable North American “Christian” culture. I’m now in a season when my prayer life consists almost entirely of tears and a deep, gut-wrenching plea of “fill me, Lord, I am utterly unable to even pray without You.”
Am I alone?
I think that some types of prayer are more difficult for Canadians because we are naturally cynical. That cynicism is great for producing comedy writers, but not so helpful in developing men and women of faith. Great expectation based on the unlimited power of God collides with stark realism.
Two summers ago we visited what was at the time the satellite campus of Harvest Bible Chapel in Elgin, Illinois which is now their main campus. The large, futuristic office building and surrounding acreage was the headquarters of a cleaning and maintenance company, and was, I believe, given to the ministry for a token $1 donation.
God does stuff like this. I really believe He does. It’s so easy to say, “This is something that happened one time, in one place, for one group of people;” but I believe God is about the business of putting together stories like this one. I picture God in my own similar situations looking at me and saying, “Okay, ask me!”
I live about about an hour east of Toronto. Land and buildings in that city are so prohibitive that many churches have given up hope. Then, suddenly, in the middle of all this, an economic crisis strikes in such a way that facilities start opening up everywhere. The impossible is suddenly very possible; and the prayer request suddenly seems not so gigantic.
Keep believing! Pray with your eyes open, scanning the horizon with expectation.
Ol, no sei como cham-lo, seria Tim?Bem, leio o seu blog e amo-o, no momento em que estou lendo este post passo por dificuldades tremendas. Estou aos ps de Jesus, amando e colocando nele a confiana que consigo. No entanto, no consigo receber respostas de orao. Eu estava financeiramente bem, mas perdi tudo o que tinha, inclusive minha famlia. Estou tentando me recuperar, mas no h portas abertas, choro e peo a Deus principalmente que me faa am-lo mais que minhas necessidades, que quebre-me todo,mas me revele seu amor, pois estou aflito e j no acho que Deus me ame, pois no consigo que Ele escute minhas oraes. Por favor me ajudem em orao, intercedam por mim. um corao sincero e aflito que vos pede. Obrigado em Cristo Jesus.
Thanks for the wisdom, saints. Having been studying and teaching lately on these elements of our role in God’s world, your words are an encouraging cap on a demanding series of days. I pray for power and grace in your ministries.
Great post, Mr. Challies.
Jake
I just thought I would ask you why you seem to believe that we are God’s marionettes. Have any of the posts in response to this answered this for you?If not I thought that perhaps the words of a friend of mine might help. I could have written out something myself, but I thought my friend’s answer to a similar comment did it better than I could.
“Are you saying that men are but helpless puppets who do nothing of their own volition? If that is true, then no man can be justly condemned for what he does because he will be able to say at the Judgment, “I couldn’t help myself; God made me do it!” But the truth is that God’s predestination doesn’t force anyone to do anything that isn’t in accordance with their will. We see this in the crucifixion of Christ, where men most willingly nailed Jesus to the cross AND God had foreordained that they should do this exactly as they did in eternity. (Acts 2:22, 23; 3:18; 4:26-28) BOTH are true; God’s sovereignty and man’s responsibility.
Likewise in salvation, God predestinated a certain number of sinners to be saved by faith in Jesus Christ. The Holy Spirit, working in conjunction with the Word of God regenerates the spiritual dead soul of a person, giving him/her a new nature or disposition. This new nature is inclined toward God and is naturally opposed to sin; the opposite of what the old nature was. So, as a sinner naturally hates God and loves to commit sin, likewise the regenerated sinner loves God and hates sin. Consequently, this born again sinner naturally repents and turns to Christ in faith. It is NOT God the Spirit who repents and believes. It is the person who does these two things, most willingly and by choice. Men always do that which is most desirable to them at any given moment. They are never forced to do anything against their will… NEVER! It is always man’s choice to do what he does.
There is no conflict here whatsoever, which the ultra hyper-Calvinists are want to find. The repentance and faith required (prerequisites) for justification are indeed gifts of God which are the fruit of regeneration. They are of grace and thus their origin is with God and not man so that no one can boast. And, it is the individual who actually repents and believes, not God. The person is responsible to repent and believe not God. In fact, ALL men are responsible to repent and believe, but only those who have been given a new nature, who have been regenerated have the desire and ability to do so. That desire and ability, again is of grace and not of man’s creation. Yet there is still the necessity that man choose to repent and believe upon Christ. Those who are regenerated will do so infallibly because they are predisposed to do so.” Jeff
Tim,
Thanks for this post. I have been struggling with some of these same things. Reading through the Valley of Vision is always a great encouragement. I am also reading through a book on prayer by DA Carson, Spiritual Reformation, which is proving to be very convicting and helpful. As I read this post I was also reminded and encouraged by the words to Before the Throne,
Before the throne of God above I have a strong and perfect plea, A great High Priest whose name is love Who ever lives and pleads for me. My name is graven on His hands, my name is written on His heart, I know that while in heaven he stands, no tongue can bid me thence depart.
Well, as of course you know, Grace Fellowship’s fledgling church plant just got a building for free in downtown Toronto and we prayed the same way. So I do not doubt that the Lord can do it for our mother church as well!!!
great post!!
Yes, Mr. Hardy, the marionette statement was the main reason for the pseudonym, Devil’s advocate. I am in full accord with your friend’s explanation which is very sharp, thank you for it. I would be less than sincere, however, if I said I don’t still sometimes feel like a puppet insofar as my election goes.
My initial intent was to comment on prayer - that praying for the salvation of the unregenerate falls in the same category of, say, praying for Christ’s expedient return. We are delighted and dutiful in praying as such but the Divine counsel here is impassable.
My greatest hurdle still is that all men are invariably bound to both their nature (either for or against God) and to the Divine counsel unto salvation (either elect or reprobate).
The Infral. / Supral. element of the discussion has been, up to now, my only modest comfort in this reconciling of my powerlessness unto salvation. If Infralapsarianism is true, then it is miraculous that any man should be reconciled to God, for all deserve nothing less than hell. If Supralapsarianism is true, it seems possible that God could be unworthy of worship as one who condemns men before they sin, yea even before their very creation.
Again, this is the Devil’s advocate coming out. God’s use of vessels for wrath are, without doubt, Scriptural and glorifying. I understand and agree fully with man’s free agency as your friend describes it. This is ultimately a wrestling with God about who knows better, i.e. I know better than He when it comes to election and reprobation. Thanks for the help, this is another victory in the battle to subvert the divergent paradigm.
Jake
Concerning Infra/Supra, to tell you the truth although I have my leanings, I think in the end it is just man’s attempt to explain away something that God hasn’t given us enough information about to know for sure. Which actually is not a big problem; there are many things in His Word that God only gives so much information on. Yet, what He has revealed we can cling to, regardless of whether we fully understand the complexities of it or not.Arminians take there view of election on the basis of what they believe is fair with themselves in mind. Open Theists, come to the logical view based on the same fair understanding that Arminians do, but with a twist. They believe that in order for God to be fair, God must not know with certainty what will happen in the future.Calvinists on the other hand start with God and let God speak for Himself. In this way, Calvinists rightly understand that it isn’t about us, it is about Him. Rm. 9:18-21
I couldn’t embrace the truth of Calvinism, before I started looking at things (so to speak) through God’s eyes, rather than my own sinful selfish eyes.I find that my biggest struggle in this area comes when I take my eyes off of where I they should be.
This is, if not the, one of the main reasons why prayer is so difficult for me. This post was timely and poignant, thanks.
Rich
If it isn’t too personal of a matter for you. Could you please share what in particular you are talking about when you said: “This post was timely and poignant, thanks.”I am always interested in things like that, so I can better understand how people think.