Seven Steps To a Good Breakup

Not every relationship works out. Not every couple who begins dating ends up getting married. Neither should they. In fact, for a dating relationship to be healthy, there must be a way out. As Sam Andreades says, “If you are not able to end a dating relationship, you should never start one.” And so, “Before the day you say I do, you always have to be able to say, I don’t. In your heart, you must be able to not …

What’s Wrong With Christian Dating (Part Two)

What has gone wrong with Christian dating? Join me for the second part of the discussion (see part one right here) of some common questions about Christian dating and purity.   Transcript What qualities should you look for in a potential mate? Well, the very first quality you need to look for is salvation. The Bible makes it very, very clear that a Christian can only marry another Christian. You may not marry somebody who is an unbeliever. You should …

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What’s Wrong with Christian Dating

What on earth has gone wrong with Christian dating? Why does it seem so much more difficult today than it was just a generation ago? In this video I discuss some common questions about dating and purity. It is available in both YouTube and Facebook formats.   Transcript How should Christians approach dating in our culture today? So, somehow between 1998 when I got married and today, all sorts of weird things have happened. And somehow dating, pursuing marriage has …

The Problem with Love Languages – Three-Minute Thursdays #3

If you are a Christian (and maybe even if you’re not) you’ve probably heard of “love languages.” I believe love languages can be both helpful and unhelpful depending how we use them. In this video I try to explain where they are helpful and where perhaps they aren’t. Here it is in Facebook and YouTube formats, followed by a transcript. Rush Transcript Welcome to another edition of Three Minute Thursdays, where I try to say something important, maybe even helpful, …

Ask Me Anything (Calvinism, Erotica, Giving, Church Libraries, and Sex Before Marriage)

Ask Me Anything is an opportunity for you to submit questions that are related or unrelated to things I’ve written, and for me to take a shot at answer them. This week’s questions concern Calvinism, a husband who wants his wife to read erotica, pastors who give to their own church, the usefulness of church libraries, and conundrums in dating relationships. Do you believe that God calls everyone? In other words, that He takes the initiative in drawing all people to …

Have I Sinned Against You?

I once had an unexpected, startling confrontation with another Christian. I was a speaker at a conference and walking from one event to another when an individual came charging up to me. He got right up in my face, like a batter arguing strikes with an umpire, and began to tell how I had offended him. I quickly learned I had done something he found irritating and he wanted me to know all about it. I listened to him for …

Letters to the Editor (Hurting Others, Video Games, Seminary)

It has been nearly a year since I laid the comments section to rest and begin inviting letters to the editor in its stead. It has been a blessing to receive so many hundreds of letters over the past year and to be able to share the best of them. Here are a few from the past couple of weeks. Comments on Are You Going to Hurt Me? Tim, thank you for writing the “Are You Going to Hurt Me” article. …

Letters to the Editor (Hurting Others, Video Games, Seminary)

It has been nearly a year since I laid the comments section to rest and begin inviting letters to the editor in its stead. It has been a blessing to receive so many hundreds of letters over the past year and to be able to share the best of them. Here are a few from the past couple of weeks. Comments on Are You Going to Hurt Me? Tim, thank you for writing the “Are You Going to Hurt Me” …

Believing the Worst of Those Who Love Me Most

There is a stubbornness to sin that surprises and disappoints. The Christian life is one of increasing triumph over sin, and yet even with the rejoicing there is so much disappointment, even with the victory there is so much failure, even while so much sin is put to death, so much remains. One area of sin that continues to baffle and disappoint is my inability to consistently think rightly about other people’s motives. Perhaps it isn’t thinking about their motives …

Loving Our Enemies

Today we come to our second-to-last reading in John Stott’s classic work The Cross of Christ. We are in a section that discusses some of the implications of the cross, or, as Stott phrases it, “living under the cross.” He wants us to know that the cross directs our conduct in relation to other people which leads to this chapter’s topic: loving our enemies. Loving Our Enemies I sense that the book is beginning to slow down a little bit. While …