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Freedom in Christ
- 01/21/09
- 26
My friend and I had taken hours out of our weekend to clean Barb’s squalid, rundown house. But then, when she got home, she was angry—very angry. Now there was one thing I neglected to say about Barb. Beside her couch/bed was one of those Rubbermaid containers, the kind with several drawers. Each of these drawers contained an assortment of silk Hermes scarves. Each of these scarves, we later learned, had been bought for several hundred dollars and Barb had assembled them as a kind of savings account. She was convinced that each one was going to increase in value and eventually bring her great wealth. She considered them an investment. Little wonder that she slept right beside them and checked on them carefully every time she returned to her house. That was exactly what she did when she returned home this time. As soon as she saw that we had been touching her stuff, her precious stuff, she began to grumble and to mutter about how we were being careless and harsh (even though she had invited us to help her clean up). After running inside to count her Hermes scarves and ensure that we had not stolen any of them (she washed her hands before touching them), she began sorting through the garbage bags, looking to make sure we hadn’t thrown away anything of value. She also rummaged through the boxes of clothes we had marked as “sell,” remarking that she simply couldn’t get rid of those things, even though they were far too small for her. Barb was quite a big woman but wanted to lose weight. To motivate her weight loss program she had purchased an entire designer wardrobe in her desired size. A long time had elapsed since she had purchased her size six wardrobe and, though she had made no progress, she just knew that she would need these clothes before long. Eventually she agreed to allow us to sell a very few pairs of shoes and boots on her behalf (though upon later inspection we found that many of these, though they had never been worn, had been chewed upon or lived in by mice and were, thus, valueless).
At the end of the day we were tired and dirty but felt that we had done something to help Barb’s plight. The house was still a disgusting disaster, but we had brought some order to the chaos, at least in one of the rooms, and felt that the house was just a bit more livable than when we had arrived. I guess Barb disagreed because she never allowed us to return. In fact, she thanked our friends by beginning to throw trash over her fence and into their yard. Using eBay, we eventually sold the items she had allowed us to sell and brought her the money. She was livid and threatened to call the police, saying we had ripped her off. She was insistent that the clothes were worth more now than when she had purchased them—that clothes appreciated in value. She decided she was going to hold on to the rest of her things. Perhaps her money problems had eased by then.
It’s a sad story this one. It affected me deeply. It was a few years ago since it all happened but since then I’ve thought about it often. To me, Barb is a picture of slavery to sin. Sure there may be some mental illness involved, but what is this kind of mental illness if not captivity to one or more of the devil’s lies? She had slowly removed herself from the real world to live in a world of her stuff—a world that she perpetuated by collecting and accruing ever more stuff. She needed her stuff—her clothes, her books, her scarves. She loved them and coddled them, treasuring them like they were the children she never had. Her life was miserable and she sought solace in her growing mountain of possessions. The piles accumulated and became a mountain—a filthy, dusty, smelly mountain—but it was hers and she loved it. To the rest of us her house was unlivable. To her it was home. She seemed to know every pile of trash and regarded each piece of junk as treasure.
I thought of Barb the other day when considering the mountains of sin in my own heart. I had one of those days where I marveled at the reality of sin in my life, that after so many years of being a Christian, after so many years of following Christ, such sin could still live within me. And like Barb’s valueless junk, there is sin I love. I hold onto it, treasuring it, coddling it, babying it, clinging to it. I take refuge in this sin; I take comfort in it. Others surely see it for what it is; the Bible tells me exactly what it is. Yet it’s mine and I’ve grown quite fond of it over the years. These mountains of junk are my secret treasure.
There is a difference, though. Barb was enslaved by her sin. Mental illness; spiritual illness; I don’t know what it was. But I do know that she was entrapped and enslaved by it. In moments of lucidity she could see what she needed to do but so quickly she would come crawling back to her stuff like a dog returns to its vomit. But by the grace of God I’ve been set free from enslavement to my sin. There may be part of me that continues to love my sin, but there is a greater part of me that hates it and that fights it. Through Christ I’ve been given freedom, freedom to fight against that sin and, better still, to overcome it. Sin lives within me, but it no longer enslaves me. But only because of God’s amazing, immeasurable grace. Ephesians 2 describes me well, “And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience—among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind.” Then comes the great conjunction of verse 4: “But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved…” By God’s mercy, I can overcome those mountains of garbage within.
I don’t know how Barb’s story ends. A year after we tried to help her out, her house went on the market and quickly sold. We knew that a developer must have bought the property for the land as the house was far beyond saving. But Barb reneged on the deal. A few months later it was on the market again and quickly sold. Our friends left the neighborhood shortly after when a developer bought all of the surrounding properties, planning to build a series of retirement condos. Barb must have left around the same time.
I’ve often wondered how Barb moved. Did she take all of her stuff with her? Or did she leave it all behind and just walk away? What did she do with all of the money from her property which must have fetched at least half a million dollars? Did moving from her house help her break free of what was clearly a serious addiction and a serious mental and spiritual problem? Or is she, even right now, sleeping on a couch with her Hermes scarves and other treasures piled all around her? Somehow I’m inclined to think she is. God help her.
I am a follower of Jesus Christ, a husband to Aileen and a father to three young children. I worship and serve as a pastor at 
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Comments (26)
I had a very similar experience trying to serve a woman who was living in squalor.
I love to organize—making order from chaos is a joy and I’ve helped lots of people over the years … overflowing desks, kids’ rooms, money management documentation. I love file folder and storage tubs and helping people discover the systems they already have and helping them to improve.
But pretty much the exact same thing that happened to your friend and you happened to me. I was invited by a woman to help. She lived not only in chaos, but absolute filth. I worked and worked and cleaned and cleaned—only to have her return with anger and accusations and a clear instruction to never return.
It really shook me—but helped me to grow in wisdom, too. I should have been more careful and I should have sought and listened to the counsel of more experienced people. In the future, I’m trying not to be scared off from stepping into such acts of mercy. (I was definitely scared off there for awhile.) But I do pray that I would approach such service a little more shrewdly, for everyone’s sake.
Anyway—what a comfort to know that I am not the only one, Tim! Thanks for your ongoing ministry. You encourage and edify us all.
Blessings to you and yours—
In Christ our Joy,Tara B.
What an incredible picture of sin in our lives, so much of the time I cling to the worthless things that I think will deliver true satisfaction. I’m so incredibly thankful for the immeasurable patience of my Father, He truly is most glorified when we are most satisfied in Him. Thanks for this post today Tim, much needed. BlessingsRon Reffett
Some how I feel that our (the human race) situation was so much worse compared to this lady’s and Jesus came to us anyway. And how did we repay Him for the sacrifice of His time, energy, service and self denial? Murder. Thank you Jesus that you did not leave us in that mess, but had patience with us and saved us from it. Lord help those that still wallow in the filth.
As Piper so aptly points out, salvation is more than a change of appetite, but it cannot be less than that. As pigs, we love our mire, and even if we’re taken out and bathed, we hurry back in. But when God changes us from pigs to sheep, so to speak, the mire becomes disgusting to us.
This poor woman’s story is such an apt picture of slavery to sin. May the Lord in His mercy set her free!
Why does everyone, Tim included, feel the need to hedge when talking about this woman’s mental condition, or, alternately, attribute her behavior to run-of-the-mill sin nature? She’s obviously delusional, obsessive-compulsive and paranoid. I’m not a psychiatrist so I’m probably using the wrong terms, but you get the idea. If her mental illness were magically “fixed” she’d still be a sinful person, but she probably wouldn’t be living in squalor, hoarding scarves and imagining that her clothes will appreciate in value. It’s these things, the ones that are most likely attributable to mental illness, that are the most “shocking” things about this woman’s condition. Without them she’d be just another divorcee with expensive tastes and a lot of shoes.
Great story!
This is really sad…a woman very lost.
One of the things I believe you are missing is something a friend of mine shared with me. I was complaining about my mother-in-law, how I had spent HOURS cleaning her house just to be able to bring in a suit case. She shared with me that women and children with a history of sexual abuse can be readily identified by the dirt, messiness, and hording seen in their home. She is a teacher and this is THE red flag that identifies children with abuse in their homes. With Barb’s history of broken relationships and identification and security in her things, this is likely to be a base cause. It is important to recognize we all have things lingering under the surface. It can be sin, it can be mental illness, or sometimes a deep need for love. It always is a need for Christ. I appeal to you to keep your heart tender toward individuals like Barb.
“…but for the grace of God go I…”
I am a recovering packrat. A few years back I decided to do some woodworking and started to make space in the garage which was the start of my recovery. Finding that much of my ‘stuff’ had rusted or rotted in the years since I had packed it up and moved into this house made me realize how silly my motto was. I’ve forgotten the exact wording (maybe that’s good) but it went something like, “I don’t know what’s in that box but I know it’s too important to throw out.” The fact that the boxes had been set aside for about five years should have been my first clue that I didn’t need the contents.
I also have a collection of guitars, the turning point there was the realization that I could either spend my time playing a few of them (and let the rest go) or spend all my free time on maintenance. It boils down to enjoy the gift or be a slave to it. I haven’t sold them yet, it’s hard since I’ve got to do the maintenance first and then I think, “I should keep this one now that I’ve got it set up nice…” but I have given a few away - that feels good and I’m not seeing the depreciation and I do have plans to sell some others.
OK that’s my story, no vermin chewing or defecating but I understand how it could happen, and I thank God for saving me…
Thanks and God bless,-jim
Who doesn’t love their sin? It’s a sin to love your sin.
I’m a sinner. Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner.
With regards to Barb, there but for the grace of God, go I.
Thanks Tim for writing such a tremendous 2-parter with a powerful summarizing lesson for all of us.
Great analogy for our love of and our blindness to our sin(s), Tim.
In response to the discussion re: “mental illness” :
Taken from the website of Harvest Bible Chapel (near Chicago),
“God needs no new or unique insight into the human condition in order to change lives, regardless of whether that insight is gained through psychology or some other tool of human origin. Problems that are approached by integrating the Scriptures with psychological theories tend to deceive individuals into diminishing the God of the Scriptures and into believing that He has not provided and cannot provide sufficient truth, insight, and wisdom that will change their lives (Colossians 2:8-10).
When psychology and other social sciences step beyond observing human behavior and seek to explain the causes of human behavior, they enter spiritual territory. Only the God of the Scriptures can explain causes and offer solutions that lead to godliness and a fruitful, joyful life. God has given us everything we need for life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3). He changes us as we discipline ourselves through obedience to the Word of God in the power of the Holy Spirit (1 Timothy 4:7; 2 Peter 1:5-11).”
J.P.H.Maybe its you who is hedging around the idea that it is their excessive depravity that causes most people to go off their rocker, and attributing it to mental illness is just a cop out, an excuse. Seems to me the bible speaks of those who appear mentally ill as those who are demon possessed or sin obsessed, yet in todays godless society we default to it being mans problem that man can fix, if only we understood the human mind, hogwash!I’m not saying their is no mental illness, there is, but I think so called “doctors” have made a killing off this industry, and fuel it through medication and decept. Again, just my 2 cents.
I cannot believe you have never told me this story before…that is really sad.
The only thing worse than life with our obsessions and idols is life without them! They control; we are the obliging slaves. But better that than that oh, so unnatural state of freedom Christ holds out. How we fear and detest the loosening of our chains! Truly, sin and insanity are so two sides of a coin.
Don’t know how that “so” got into the last line of my comment. I sound like a Hollywood teenager!
This is a great post Tim. You reminded me of a set of scriptures that discusses freedom from the law.
Hebrews 7:11-19
11If perfection could have been attained through the Levitical priesthood (for on the basis of it the law was given to the people), why was there still need for another priest to come—one in the order of Melchizedek, not in the order of Aaron? 12For when there is a change of the priesthood, there must also be a change of the law. 13He of whom these things are said belonged to a different tribe, and no one from that tribe has ever served at the altar. 14For it is clear that our Lord descended from Judah, and in regard to that tribe Moses said nothing about priests. 15And what we have said is even more clear if another priest like Melchizedek appears, 16one who has become a priest not on the basis of a regulation as to his ancestry but on the basis of the power of an indestructible life. 17For it is declared: “You are a priest forever, in the order of Melchizedek.”
18The former regulation is set aside because it was weak and useless 19(for the law made nothing perfect), and a better hope is introduced, by which we draw near to God.
http://www.reigningimmortal.com
Barbara #11:
Do you honestly believe this woman has no physiological problem? If you believe, as the author of that quote does, that “explaining the causes of human behavior” is exclusively a spiritual endeavor, how do you account for the effectiveness (in some situations) of anti-psychotic drugs to treat behaviors exactly like the one “Barb” exhibits in Tim’s story? Can we “treat” sin?
Of course not. What we ~can~ occasionally treat are real, physical problems in the brain, which give rise to irrational, delusional and paranoid behavior.
Curtis #12:
I’m not hedging at all. Based on Tim’s description, and with the understanding that I’m not a doctor, I’m almost positive this woman suffers a very real mental illness beyond the sin nature we all share.
Is mental illness overdiagnosed? Probably. Look at how many people “treat” stress with sedatives. But, as you admit, that does not imply that real mental illness doesn’t exist, or that this particular woman doesn’t suffer from it. I’m open to the possibility that she is suffering some sort of spiritual oppression. What I’m not open to is the notion that her condition is purely the result of normal, everyday sin.
J.P.H.,
It’s a misconception that psychotropic medications address any true physiological aberration; because there is no substantive proof of said aberrations (or imbalances). Do the medications change behavior? Of course they do…they are effective at irritating the brain in predictable ways. So are alcohol and recreational drugs.
Great article and very convicting. Thank you for sharing.
Great article Tim!! That analogy is helpful and convicting on several levels. I could see myself and my sin in that picture of the woman - even if it is in a much slighter way. But nonetheless, it was somewhat of a cautionary tale concerning sin by way of allegory.
On the Christian service end of things, however, I think there may be something to further learn too. Many times when an individual or a church decides to step into someone else’s life mess with good intent of being helpful to them, we go into it like a special operations mission. We paratroop in guns blazing, superman “s” on our chests, saying to ourselves “here I am to save the day” and thinking that we will be greeted as liberators after winning a short, calculated battle. However, the reality is quite different most times. If we aren’t invested for the entire war, then we should not be surprised if our actions don’t change everything over night.
Another thing that I noticed is that the woman was not participating with the crew that was trying to clean up her home. Possibly a minor point, but the same thing has happened to me on several occasions when some of us have volunteered to help rennovate or clean out someone’s room or home. I think it might. possibly illustrate an important element in our service for others. That is that we should * come along side * the other person, participating in the work with them and to stick with the work. If they don’t participate, there isn’t a shared sacrifice, and I don’t think there can be change. Also, if we minister along side the other person, we have a better opportunity to earn the right to share the truth about their dirty, messy lives, as well as sin and grace.
These are just a few thoughts from past experience. What do you all think?
A few comments:What is my expression of “going” and “showing mercy toward” someone who I am a neighbor to (see Luke 10:33,34)— who “lives in the ditch”—to look like when they ask me to help them get their ox out of the ditch?
What do I do with the confusion of heart and mind I experience when so requested? Do I need to figure out (judge) whether the “ditch living” comes from mental illness, a heart hardened by sin, or the result of the sin of others (an abuser) that sent them “into the ditch”, before I do anything to help, or decide not to, or help for a while and then quit when things “get crazy” (distrust, cursing and correction, instead of the expressions of humble gratitude I expect [lust for])?
Putting a child in such an environment would be abuse and neglect—but as a community do we let an “adult” do whatever they wish, so long as they don’t violate a municipal code or criminal law? I know what do do if, as I drive over the bridge, I see someone on the edge about to jump to his death (i.e., use everything I know, short of deadly force, to get him off the edge ASAP and to a hospital.) Is Barb commiting “slow” suicide? If so, what do I do to show mercy?
Thanks for the blog and this post.
Curtis: “Seems to me the bible speaks of those who appear mentally ill as those who are demon possessed or sin obsessed”
I suppose it depends if you’re really talking about those who *appear* mentally ill and those who truly *are* mentally ill. We’re all sin-obsessed, to one degree or another.
Curtis continued: “I’m not saying their is no mental illness, there is, but I think so called “doctors” have made a killing off this industry, and fuel it through medication and decept.”
I definitely agree. Much sin is labeled “sickness” or “disorder” by doctors. This doesn’t, however, negate the fact that there truly are diseases/sicknesses/disorders.
Barbara: “It’s a misconception that psychotropic medications address any true physiological aberration; because there is no substantive proof of said aberrations (or imbalances). Do the medications change behavior? Of course they do…they are effective at irritating the brain in predictable ways. So are alcohol and recreational drugs.”
Give the above statement, I’m interested to hear your thoughts on clinical depression. Would you equate someone taking meds for that illness with someone snorting coke?
Tim: A lot to think about in this article, thank you for writing it. Would you consider compulsive hoarding to be only or primarily the result of sin? (In a direct sense, not in the sense that all disease is a result of the fall).
#18:
With regard to schizophrenia, just to choose one disorder commonly treated by those types of medications, numerous studies have demonstrated a genetic component. While the mechanisms may not be fully understood, it’s hard to argue that schizophrenia isn’t to some extent physiological. Unless you’re going to argue that certain sin issues are spiritually imputed from parent to child in some fashion that doesn’t involve genetics or environment.
To Tim and fellow Saints,I was amazed as I read Tim`s subject over the last couple of days, as I am faced with the somewhat of the same situation now.There is a person in our little fellowship that I have known for years, know of their background, knew of the troubled marriage that many tried to help with and the instability associated at times with this person, ( the spouse of this person has since died a few years ago), knew of the initial clutter that the spouse, children and friends tried to deal with, and now, seveal days ago in an unannounced visit by myself to their home, saw on the porches and in the house the same thing you have described. The person was not home, so I did not enter the house, and therefore do not know if there are any vermin involved with the immense clutter and garbage, but it was of the extreme type of mess that would make headline news in the local papers, etc. I was stunned. I had only read about this happening occasionally, and usually to someone who didn`t have a profession of faith in our Lord.I`ve spoken to some who are somewhat aware of what might be there, and who know the person, yet have not seen the place in months. I was told just this evening that the subject had been brought up with a child of this person, and they were told by the child it probably wouldn`t do any good.This person attends our fellowship, regularly has spiritual input into the fellowship and peoples lives, yet most, if not almost all, are ignorant of the situation.My question to all of you Saints is, how would you address it, given the past resistance, evasion, etc, that was usually encountered. Let it go and pray for the person, lovingly confront/come along side, implore the children to get intensely involved, or? What has been your experience, or what have you heard that seemed to work best. I have been and will be bringing this before the Lord, as I do not want to just turn a deaf ear, yet do not want to stick my face into a part of their life that I have no business in. And now I also look to the Brothers and Sisters in the Body of Christ for their input. I thank the Lord for Tim writing about this once more. God bless!
Just something to think about.Have you ever wondered why in biblical times, it seemed as though everywhere Jesus and the disciples went there was someone who was demon possessed? Now adays I think we attribute much demonic activity to mental illness. Are there fewer demons today than then? No. Just “wiser” greedy men who deny such a thing as demonic possession.
Hi all.
My degrees are in psychology and I’ve worked in Community Mental Health Centers, in the field, running a children’s clinic, and in Administration for 7 years. I’ve also been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder.
The story of Barb is a great read and really illustrates some very though provoking points about slavery to sin. What disturbs me though, are some of the comments tying severe mental illnesses with demonic infestation or fiction. If you’re going to do that — please also do the same for diabetes. A mental illness (I can’t stand the term) is a medical illness. No more no less. It is treatable the same as other illnesses — with varying degrees of success.
Does Barb have a mental illness? I don’t know, none of us do. There are many variables to look into — most notably, an in-depth diagnostic conversation with Barb.
Too often people afflicted with such illnesses are told to “pray more.” Psychotropic medications are looked at as something to avoid. Only incredibly ignorant people would say those things. They simply don’t know the facts (research).
And as an aside: to #8 — Those “flags” could also mean that they are simply dirty individuals that never learned the value of cleaning. You’d have to consider a ton of other things before concluding abused children can be “readily identified” by those things.
James