Friday Frivolity

It’s four in the afternoon and I am only just getting to the Friday Frivolity. My most profuse apologies go to everyone, but Amy in particular.

This is completely non-frivolous but some have asked me about the heart issues I was having a couple of weeks ago. I finally got the call-back from the doctor who told me I have two conditions. The first was Bipolar Cheddarprolapse Valvelobotomy and the second Microvalve Discumbobulatory Oranganeck. Or something like that. I knew I should have paid more attention in biology classes.

The first of the conditions is benign but symptomatic which means it may cause fatigue and dizziness but won’t kill me. The second is less-benign but not too dangerous unless it progresses, at which point it sometimes requires a pacemaker. I’m going to assume that it won’t go that far since I’m not really into pacemakers. The doctor decided I should see a cardiologist who will probably want me to wear one of those awful monitors for a full week. That would be torturous.

So, I suppose it’s good news.

And now here is your weekly dose of frivolity, courtesy of my mom. Ten ways you might know that a redneck has been using your computer…

1. 10. The monitor is up on blocks.
2. 9. Outgoing faxes have tobacco stains on them.
3. 8. The six front keys have rotted out.
4. 7. The extra RAM ports have truck parts stored in them.
5. 6. The numeric keypad only goes up to six.
6. 5. The password is “Bubba”.
7. 4. There’s a gun rack mounted on the CPU.
8. 3. There’s a Coors can in the cup holder(CD-ROM drive).
9. 2. The keyboard is camouflaged.
10. AND the number 1 way to tell if a redneck has been working on a computer is…
11. 1. The mouse is referred to as a “critter”.

And one more. Ever wondered about the origins of CTRL-ALT-DELETE? Watch this video. I’m not sure if that is a deliberate shot at Bill Gates or not. But it’s hilarious.