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Family Worship
- 06/25/06
- 11
Matthew Henry once wrote regarding family worship, “Here the Reformation must begin.” If we are to experience the fullness of God’s blessings and are to be as faithful to Him as we can be, we must begin with the family, the very building block of God’s kingdom. This is something that was understood by the first and second generation Dutch-Canadian Christians among whom I grew up. Every meal was begun with prayer and every meal ended in a time of family worship. I do not recall any exceptions. This was the expectation of all families, and I am quite sure that nothing short of natural disaster would interfere with this family worship. It impacted myself and my family deeply.
Outside of those Dutch circles it seems that family worship is far less common. I find it strange that at a time when there is such a great deal of discussion about the priority and nature of worship, so little attention has been given to family worship. Don Whitney seeks to remedy that in his new booklet entitled Family Worship: In the Bible, in History & in Your Home.
While at 32 pages this book is merely an introduction to family worship, it is at once valuable and convicting. Dr. Whitney takes a logical approach to the topic. He begins with proving from Scripture that family worship is an expectation God has for all believers and then shows how believers through the centuries have understood the importance of this discipline. One chapter is dedicated to the elements of family worship, which he identifies as reading Scripture, prayer and singing. After answering several “what if” situations, a final chapter encourages familes to begin worshipping together today. A small discussion guide wraps up the book.
As in all of his books, Dr. Whitney depends primarily on Scripture and secondarily on the consensus of great Christians of the past to support his arguments. And as with his previous books, what he writes is both convincing and convicting. I was convicted that I need to increase the priority of family worship and to seek to make it not something that we do most of the time, but something we do all the time. In this small way I can show my children just how important it is that we give priority to the time we spend hearing from and crying out to God.
In truth, I had but two minor complaints about this book. The first was the length. This cannot be helped, for the booklet is intended to serve as only an introduction to this topic, but I would love the opportunity to read more on this topic (and especially from the pen of Dr. Whitney). The second, related to the first, was that Dr. Whitney did not include a “recommended resources” section at the close of the book. Still, by referring to the footnotes I found a few other resources that looked promising.
Family Worship is a great introduction to a topic of great importance. I recommend it for any and all Christian families. It is available for order through BiblicalSpirituality.com and costs only a few dollars. Volume discounts are available, so why not buy several? There is not a family that cannot benefit from this book.

I am a follower of Jesus Christ, a husband to Aileen and a father to three young children. I worship and serve as a pastor at 


Releasing on April 1, The Next
Comments (11)
This isn’t a criticism. I believe that family worship time is valuable and essential but I do believe the dinner table and meal-time are a bit over done. We don’t have a dining room and the kitchen table is extremely small. There isn’t enough room for our family of four to sit together and eat in the kitchen. We usually stand together, holding hands, and ask the Lord’s blessing on the meal and then we scatter. We eat most of our meals in the living room but occasionally some one or two will stay in the kitchen area.
The TV is not a distraction. In fact, it is often the source of some very lively conversations. If a situation or story arises on the tube that I want to discuss, I’ll mute the TV and start the discussion. Jeopardy really gets us going!
My biggest regret is not teaching my boys to sing more. You wouldn’t want to hear us try our hand at singing a hymn without accompaniment!
Where we gather to eat as a family, there is no TV. Praying as a family is so ingrained in our family that I have “caught” my 4 little ones, ages 3, 4 year old twins and 5 years old, praying as they “play” house or eat a snack that they got out of the pantry. t is so engrained in our family that when my husband and I went out on a date recently and left our 2 older boys to kidsit the 4 little ones, we came home and as my 3 year old daughter ran up to us she said, “Mommy, I prayed for you before we ate that you would go into ‘mission” (she meant remission from multiple sclerosis).I love to sit and eat with our family. Not only to pray, but to discuss what we are challenged with, encourage one another. My husband reads a chapter of Scripture then reads a Psalm. And then I read from a book. We sing throughout the day, songs like “Humble Thyself in the sight of the Lord”… and I have caught my 3 year old in the library strumming my guitar while singing that song solo… or we will be driving and all of a sudden, without prompting, the kids will sometimes burst out singing songs like “Holy, Holy, Holy…” And there is not a whole lot that compares to listening to my children sing Scripture memory songs or reciting whole books of Scripture.
Family worship does not have to be at the dinner table. It can be anywhere. What legacy do I want to leave my children?
John Flavel, in his book “Keeping the Heart” says, “Take heed of losing the liveliness and sweetness of your communion with God, lest thereby your hearts be pulled off from God. The heart is a hungry and restless thing… THere is nothing that more engages the heart to a constancy and evenness in walking with God than the sweetness which it tastes therein…”
My husband and I did not grow up in Christian homes and have not had much exposure to families worshipping together. When we eventully do have children, we want to be able to weave family worship into all aspects of our lives.
We are trying to start some things now (before kids) by reading Scripture after our meal so that it is ingrained in our hearts first. This has not been a priority in our lives, and we both want it to be.
Does anyone has any sugguestions or know of any other books on this topic?
Thanks!
Robin,Here is a link with some wonderful resources on Family Worship.
I did not grow up with it either. However, my husband did. Much of what we do has been passed down from his grandfather and father. We have also started some of our own “family worship” traditions.
Robin, to those listed on the page linked by 4ever4given, I would add a hearty recommendation for The Family Worship Book by Terry Johnson. It includes a simple guide to getting family worship started for families that have never done it before.
Also, when families in my congregation said that they really did not know how to start, I began publishing our family’s evening worship online in a format that they could copy almost wholesale to do with their children. You may find this at http://familyworship.bethesdapca.org/. Several couples who don’t have children have found that the simplified worship and lessons suit them quite well.
Please feel free to contact me directly regarding family worship, since this is something that is very close to my heart as a pastor.
Finally, you can often find published with the Confession, the Westminster Divines’ directories for public and family worship, both of which are fantastic. It takes some effort to get past the language barrier, but it is well worth that effort. There is an online version of the directory for family worship at http://www.reformed.org/documents/wcf_sub_standards/direct_fam_worship.htmlhttp://www.reformed.org/documents/wcf_sub_standards/direct_fam_worship.html
Tim,
Thanks for a wonderful reminder of this important facet of family life. It is really disheartening that we have been deceived into thinking that Sunday school and Wednesday evening programs are where our children learn the tenants of our faith.
I agree with your assessment of D. Whitney’s pamphlet, but then again as you said, it is a pamphlet. I pray that it spurs on fathers to seek out the resources to lead family worship.
You recently had posted on the importance of catechisms in rearing up small children. I have found that , “Training Hearts, Teaching Minds” by Starr Meade is a wonderful resource for family worship.
I pray that God will awaken fathers to walk in the biblical call of their headship. Let’s stop being so lazy and put down that remote, or that book, or that hobby that hinders our leadership in this area!
Thanks for your input. I will definitely look into some of these resources both of you gave.
I really appreciate it!
the missionary family i am working with right now, they have their kids “read from the tablet of our heart” at each meal, where they all recite a scripture together. it’s pretty cool.
I am ready to be stoned!
I believe far too many Christians have been duped into thinking that they can “Train Hearts”.
The heart of our darling little children is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked. It can not be trained. It does not receive the things of the Spirit of God and it is not subject to the laws of God.
Teaching children to parrot prayers and sing hymns does not prepare them for heaven or make them love Jesus and they should not be praised for doing so.
Teach them the Word and pray that God will convict them of sin, righteousness and judgement. That is our duty.
To make them familiar with things that are of a religious nature and associate that with love for Christ and commitment to God is a dangerous practice.
For further instruction: see Nadab and Abihu.
Jabbok, I think I understand what you are saying, but I see too many children of christian parents who think they can teach their children the word of God with out practice of the word of God. Discipline is essential for our children to become maximally effective for the kingdom of God.
“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6
Before this topic falls off the main page, I just wanted to clarify something. Family Worship is not a pamphlet, but is actually a booklet (32 pages, 11,000+ words). It’s not a full-length book, but it still substantial content. I believe a second printing will use larger font and wider margins to bump it up to 64 pages.