Like the Shepherd

The great challenge in marriage is not to love our wives more but to love ourselves less, for it is self-love that generates so much of the strife we experience. To be successful husbands we must continually put to death within us whatever causes us to prioritize ourselves, our own interests, our own comfort, our own good. To do this successfully we need counsel, we need men who can make us aware of our self-love and who can provide examples …

Keep On Learning To Dance

It’s a metaphor I heard from a friend and one that has stuck with me ever since. It illustrates a common, perhaps even universal, experience within marriage—sexual intimacy is good and wonderful but, maintaining healthy intimacy through all of life’s ups and downs is a life-long challenge. The illustration goes something like this. You are a young man or woman attending a wedding reception, an old-fashioned dance in a small-town dance hall. The band takes its place on stage and …

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Letters to the Editor (Jesus Calling, Love Languages, Age of the Universe)

One of the great joys of blogging is receiving feedback from those who read what I write. Every week or two I like to collect some of the letters to the editor that I receive and share them here. What I share today represents the best of the week that was. Letters on Jesus Always, the Sequel to Jesus Calling Tim: These really are the best of what I received this week on the subjects of Jesus Always and Jesus Calling. …

Those Exquisite Forms of Love That Do Not Speak Your Language

The book has been out for years, and by this time just about every Christian has been introduced to the “love language” parlance. We know that love languages refer to the varied ways people give and receive love. Some feel loved when they receive affection, others when they receive gifts or affirming words. There are five of these languages and most of us have been taught to rank them in order of personal preference. Well and good. God has created …

Six Reasons Why Adultery Is Very Serious

Adultery is a serious matter. At least, it is a serious matter in the mind and heart of the God who created sex and marriage and who put wise boundaries on them both. But why? Why is adultery such a serious matter. Christopher Ash provides six reasons in his book Married for God and I am going to track with him as we go. Adultery is a turning away from a promise. In the mind of the adulterer, the pursuit …

Is It Okay Deliberately Not To Have Children?

Here’s a question I’ve heard a number of times in a number of different contexts: Is it okay deliberately not to have children? Is it okay for a married couple to deliberately determine that they will not at least attempt to have biological children? My immediate response has always been no, it is not okay. But I have never put a lot of thought into why or whether this response is correct. Thankfully, I got an assist from Christopher Ash …

Letters to the Editor (Petra, Marriage, Sex in Movies)

This was a banner week when it came to letters to the editor. I had a lot of letters to choose from on a lot of different subjects—something I found rather a joy. Here are some of the best of them. Comments on War, Women, and Wealth Thank you for your article on War, Women, and Wealth. That passage in Deuteronomy 17 is a nugget that can get lost. I have heard it preached several times, referring to the three …

Why Marriage Is Better Than Cohabitation

Though Christians continue to affirm the uniqueness, the goodness, and the necessity of marriage, our society continues to legitimize cohabitation as either a common precursor to marriage or a complete alternative. This slide is troubling, for marriage offers a number of important benefits that are absent from cohabitation—benefits that extend to couples, to their children, to their families, and to society as a whole. Christopher Ash helpfully outlines these in his book Married for God. 1. Marriage Is Unambiguous Unlike …

Married for God

It’s not like we’re hurting for books on marriage. In fact, there may be more Christian books on marriage than on any topic besides prayer. This means that any new book has to be awfully good to stand out from an already-crowded field. It was pure joy, then, to read Christopher Ash’s Married for God: Making Your Marriage the Best It Can Be and see it do exactly that. It is one of the very best books on marriage I …

The Bestsellers: The Love Dare

Today I continue this series of articles that takes a look at books that have been awarded the Platinum or Diamond Sales Awards from the Evangelical Christian Booksellers Association. The Platinum Award recognizes Christian books that have reached 1 million sales while the Diamond Award recognizes the few that have surpassed the 10 million mark. Today we turn our attention to a book that was based on a movie, both of which promised to strengthen and even save marriages. The Love …