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A Wedding Contract
- 10/01/07
- 10
Last week I went to Ottawa to enjoy my cousin’s wedding. It was a beautiful, classy, simple wedding. While the service was great from beginning to end, I particularly enjoyed the brief sermon which drew a startling contrast between the wisdom of the world and the wisdom of God; between the love of the world and the love of God.
The pastor began by discussing a marriage contract drawn up by Albert Einstein. With his marriage disintegrating and already participating in extra-marital affairs, Einstein made a last-ditch effort to keep his marriage somewhat intact, even if only for the sake of the children. This is the contract he sent to his wife:
A. You will make sure
- that my clothes and laundry are kept in good order;
- that I will receive my three meals regularly in my room;
- that my bedroom and study are kept neat, and especially that my desk is left for my use only.
B. You will renounce all personal relations with me insofar as they are not completely necessary for social reasons. Specifically, you will forego
- my sitting at home with you;
- my going out of traveling with you.
C. You will obey the following points in your relations with me:
- you will not expect any intimacy from me, nor will you reproach me in any way;
- you will stop talking to me if I request it;
- you will leave my bedroom or study immediately without protest if I request it.
D. You will undertake not to belittle me in front of our children, either through words or behavior.
His wife eventually agreed to them terms. When he received her response, “Einstein insisted on writing to her again ‘so that you are completely clear about the situation.’ He was prepared to live together again ‘because I don’t want to lose the children and I don’t want them to lose me.’ It was out of the question that he would have a ‘friendly’ relationship with her, but he would aim for a ‘businesslike’ one. ‘The personal aspects much be reduced to a tiny remnant,’ he said. ‘In return, I assure you of proper comportment on my part, such as I would exercise to any woman as a stranger.”
This comes from the pen (and from the heart!) of one of the brightest men the world has ever known. It’s a contract just shocking for its boldness and its polite disgust; its undertones of anger. Just imagine the state of the heart that would write such a thing.
What a contrast to the wisdom of the Bible. What a contrast to Colossians 3:5-17:
Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming. In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all.
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
What a contrast between the wisdom of the world and the wisdom of God!
I’m on my way down to Mobile, Alabama where I am going to bring a few reports from the Expositors’ Conference featuring Dr. Steve Lawson and Dr. John MacArthur. I hope to check in a bit later today…

I am a follower of Jesus Christ, a husband to Aileen and a father to three young children. I worship and serve as a pastor at 


Releasing on April 1, The Next
Comments (10)
Einstein’s wife was a better mathematician than he, and there is speculation that relativity was her work. Jealousy is a horrid mark on a man.
Tim,
This is an excellent post. It’s amazing to see that even the brightest minds of this world cannot maintain their marriage apart from God Himself. How grateful I am for God’s supernatural power.
Great post, Tim!
I can’t believe his wife accepted the contract. Your post makes me grateful Jesus saved me, for I would be just like Albert were it not for the cross!
This gives new meaning to the phrase, “Way to go, Einstein!”
Good gracious….and now we know the rest of the story….amazing! Thani.
Wow, Tim. Thanks for sharing this superb, if very sad, example of worldly thinking applied to personal relationships. Yet how many men, both Christian and not, essentially live like this? They have similar expectations without having the guts to put it in writing. How much better it is to pick up a towel and start washing feet.
It’s like a contract for a mother.
I think it’s just as sad and just as telling, if not more, that his wife actually agreed to the ‘terms.’ What despair there is when all you know is worldly wisdom - a system of vague ‘oughts’ that never come to be, with no way of redeeming all the things that have gone so wrong.
It would be foolish of me to think that we are all not capable of such selfishness in our marriages or eventual marriages. Though we may not write them out in contracts to our spouses we definitely have unrealistic and selfish expectation that we have in our minds and apply to our spouses. Only by the Grace of Christ can we live and serve with our spouses humbly.
P.S. Tim i am exstatic that you are coming to Mob-Town (mobile, AL) i hope you enjoy it here and i hope you enjoy the conference, thankyou for coming all the way down to blog it.
Great post Tim; its oddly convicting to see such blatant expression of sin, especially because my heart is often not so far from wanting to make these demands of my own wife.
I have been reading the recently written biography on Einstein. This contract was not presented at the start of his marriage but rather as a way for them to get through some difficulities. Needless to say it didn’t last long and it eventually lead to divorce.
He was great at the complexity of science but horrid at the complexity of relationship.
BTW: The biography also deals with the idea that she was better scientist. At least, according to this book there is no basis in history. While she was smart and read many of his papers he had others that we closer scientific advisors.